[Western Crossover] Wanted: Voldemort!

[The child who can become the savior will appear at the end of July] The Dark Lord had always believed this prophecy foretold the death of his destined enemy. He guessed the beginning, but not the ending. He had just dramatically blown open the door to the cottage where his enemy was hiding, only to be given a thorough beating by a girl who looked like she belonged in a completely different story. Ning Su: [Sit in Meditation, Forget the Self] [Shatter the Firmament] [Three Talents Give Birth to Life] [Exhaust the Five Directions] [Transform the Two Principles] [Transform the Two Principles] [Transform the Two Principles]... And so, Voldemort bit the dust. Eggsy: Merlin's hair... Harry: Merlin's beard... Hermione: Merlin's underwear... Ron: Merlin's lace underwear... A certain long-out-of-print portrait of Merlin and a certain agent's quartermaster Merlin: _(:з"∠)_ ↑↑↑ The story above teaches us that superstition is no good. ↑↑↑ A few things to know before reading: 1. This is a logic-free comedy, written only to make you laugh, so please don't overanalyze it. 2. The author is a Gryffindor and a Dumbledore fan. If you dislike seeing the noseless snake face bashed, this story isn't for you. 3. The author respects J.K. Rowling's canon, but is a goofball who read the books and watched the movies ages ago. The author hasn't read the guidebooks or fanfiction, so please don't bother them with fanon. If you want a story about elegant pure-blood nobility and the like, just close this one now. 4. The male lead will never be the noseless snake face. [A new Western fantasy novel by my friend Hong Jiang Hua] Eight-year-old Ella has a new home in this world: a father who is feared by everyone, is all-powerful, and is called the God of War among mortals, and a mother who stands on top of the God of War's head. But Ella is happy and worried, because she heard this story before she transmigrated. The original ending had the daughter and wife die in an accident, sending the hero down a path of destruction with no return. What can you do about that, Ella? Ella clenched her little fists. Leave it to me! This is the story of an eight-year-old girl with no special powers who saves her family and the world.