[Crossover] Mr. Time Goes Traveling

The writing is quite good, but one of the biggest superficial problems is that there are too many English words interspersed in the article, whether it is names of people, places or specific objects. Such excessive insertions will not improve the quality of the article. On the contrary, because the most readers are Chinese, the language barrier will make ordinary readers bored.

It's super messy. Doesn't this article have any CP?

The setting is very good, but the writing fails to keep up, and the story is very messy.

I like it very much =w=, the keyboard sounds and the large characters are few and far between

Isn't it a bad sentence to say that there will probably be left and right after that...

The setting is good, but the writing can't keep up. I hope the author will consider rewriting this part as he improves in the future.

After seeing this, I feel that Luo Xiaohui is not cute at all and has become a failure. Because the "father" who gave birth to them has a confused memory and cannot remember some of his children (Actually, Akira didn't do anything bad at all. He was afraid of being alone because of his identity and was unwilling to respond to Murasakihara's feelings - by the way, I doubt that as an immortal god, he can feel love - because he didn't want to delay the girl. As for cutting off the relationship, although it is immoral to make decisions for others, it is not a despised bad thing. Luo Xiaohui just said that he was a scumbag and said that Murasakihara was blind. (The content in the brackets accidentally went too far), and he also said those words to Akashi Toru. First of all, let's talk about "Akiyoshi Yoshida was stupid because of Akatsuki". This is because Akashi himself was mentally distorted and wanted to get the power of the artifact, but Kaoru saw through it and killed her to silence her. What does it have to do with Ming? This is simply like humans creating an atomic bomb and using him to start a war. In the end, the blame was placed on the atomic bomb. If the atomic bomb was conscious, he would cry a lot. Moreover, by explaining his identity in the previous chapter, Mingshi found a reason for his evil heart. Is this considered whitewashing? You must know that no matter how pitiful Hannibal's childhood was, he would still be a perverted murderer later on. No matter how extenuating the circumstances are, it cannot change the fact that he has grown up. Besides, Akashi Toru became seriously ill because of Akira. The plot is not very clear, but I remember that it had nothing to do with Akira. In the end, Akashi paid the price and cured Toru. In the end, Akashi Kaoru sacrificed his life to save his son. = =This is simply nonsense. I remember when Kaoru wrote down her name, Akira knew she wouldn't live long, and she just asked Akira to take care of her son after her death. How could she sacrifice her life to save her son. This paragraph is my biggest failure since I read this article. I have no love for Luo Xiaohui from now on (I thought he was a tsundere trying to be cute) In fact, I have also considered the setting of time. Time is all things and cannot be described in minutes and seconds. Even if human beings become extinct and life is no longer alive, time will still move forward. The change of every molecule and atom is time (of course, it cannot be known in a black hole). So you can make Ming more invincible. This is the big BOSS of the universe. Human consciousness is based on various chemicals of the body. Produced by biological reactions, human consciousness itself undergoes periodic changes, and the world outlook and life outlook are constantly shaped as time goes by. Therefore, for Ming, who has infinite time, if his ideology is really the same as that of humans, he may not think so after decades or hundreds of years. If it is different from humans, it cannot be set with human thinking, allowing him to have a weak, evasive and self-denying consciousness. I really like this article. Even though I don't recognize some of the characters, it's very well written. Come on, boy, I'll decide it's you. Don't be careless about it.

Why do you have to add English occasionally? It's like the kind of person who speaks with English words in between, which is annoying

It was obviously very joyful to watch at the beginning, but at the last sentence, tears fell.

Break it! Girl! *^O^*