Only to Be Lost in Memory Now

The writing style is good! It would have been better if the beginning was more engaging! Come on come on!

Hello Yangqin~ This is Lan Ye from the comment shop, please give me your advice. My dear article has only 8,000 words in total, and it is an ancient story. The article describes the whole process of Su Wanran from traveling to another world to falling in love with Di Xiao, and finally the separation between the two. It is precisely because the number of words about the kiss is too small and there are many plots involved, which makes the plot development of this article seem a little hasty. As an emperor, Di Xiao in the article has the coldness that an emperor should have and the deepest love hidden in his heart. It is undeniable that he loves Su Wanran, but I personally feel that the author's character makes the plot a bit awkward. Since Su Wanran, as a time-traveling woman, has strategies for governing the country and medical skills in the article, shouldn't Di Xiao, as an emperor, tie such talents to his side? Why would he use her as a marriage partner to marry another opponent who was very competitive to him? What's more, it was stated in the article that Su Wanran's master died because of the flute, so he was so sure that Su Wanran would not help the Northwest King target him under the pain of such betrayal? All this seems a bit strange. Although it is understandable that what the author wants to express is that the two people eventually drifted apart due to some irreversible life reasons, but Lan Ye still feels that this kind of plot is a bit strange in my heart, maybe because I don't like to read sadistic stories. In addition, the author did not describe the heroine's mental journey well after she learned that she had been betrayed. Because of the small number of words, many places that should have been highlighted with thick ink were instead very dull. Moreover, the supporting characters in the article, such as Xin Niang, Xi Huan, and Brother Wang, who saved the heroine, are not introduced much. Instead, they feel like characters who fell from the sky. Oyashiya did not introduce how the heroine was rescued, which made the narrative from the discovery of Dixiao's betrayal to the heroine's awakening very confusing. It is recommended not to describe characters that are not helpful to the development of the plot, such as Xiaoyun and Brother Wang. One savior is enough. As a person who attaches great importance to punctuation marks, I have never found a single period in my article. Every time the author wants to change a sentence, I just start a new natural paragraph. Is this really good? It looked so awkward to me! There are also slashes and other symbols that should not appear in normal novels. I hope the author can correct them. Another small problem is that the number of words in each chapter is different. I hope you can adjust it. Finally, the emotions described in the article are actually very sincere. It would be better if I changed them as I said above. Above. By Typos King Comment Shop, Lan Ye