Doctor Su (Writing Exercise 2)

So warm~~~~I happened to see Xiaomei's update haha~~~I suddenly felt so chewed that I had to make up for the parts I hadn't seen before

Good Words and Style Shop|Wako Outlet From the reflection on the heroine's coma at the beginning, I sincerely suggest that the author reduce the description of the heroine's thoughts. Immature descriptions of thoughts will only cause readers who have experienced various beautiful articles to abandon the article from the first chapter. I personally think that when describing the thoughts in the heroine's head, it should be concise and focused. In particular, two sentences are enough to describe the heroine's pain level. There is no need to mention it repeatedly. Moreover, when writing in the third person, it is repeatedly emphasized that the heroine's mind is not as good as directly describing the heroine's environment from a God's perspective. When writing in the third person, it is recommended to use the third person. Reserve the character's thoughts, and do not directly describe the character's thoughts. Instead, describe the character's environment, behavior, demeanor, movements, and language from the side, that is, "still holding the pipa half-hiding the face", leaving enough room for the reader's imagination, and also avoiding errors in the interpretation of the character caused by insufficient writing. It is said that excellent authors, when writing about the sad point, will not directly cut it open and write, but leave the most sad part to the readers' imagination. This does not mean that the sad point will be sad to all readers, but it can also make all readers burst into tears. That is, each reader has his own understanding of the plot, and will develop his own ideas when thinking about it, so it is naturally easy to please readers. In addition, it is quite redundant to make the heroine recall the kindness of the master to the heroine in the past when she is in severe pain. If the author's purpose in the first picture is to describe the first encounter between the hero and heroine, there is no need to mention the image of the master. When the hero rescues her, it is enough that the heroine mistakenly thinks it is the master's rescue. If the main plot has little to do with the master, wouldn't it be more logical to recall the relationship with the master in detail when the master officially appears? Or when the heroine recalls the master in a familiar scene related to the master because of a certain emotion, this will eliminate the sense of disobedience than when the heroine's mind is confused and she complains all kinds of coquettishly to the master who is unknown and has nothing to do with the matter. In the context of the beginning, and when I mentioned looking for the master later, I really felt that the master was too eye-catching. When the male and female protagonists first met, it would be better to spend more time describing some small details to promote their relationship (PS. I really want to complain about the word "splash" that appears in many places. This word is really inappropriate to use. 1. It mostly describes something spraying around, 2. When it is related to thoughts, it is mostly used as part of a sentence modification, such as: "Thinking" "The moment when sparks burst out", "making wisdom burst out with brilliant brilliance", instead of suddenly remembering certain pictures or things, "the day (time) XX suddenly burst into his mind", which has a strong sense of dissonance, or it can be changed to "he suddenly remembered that time XX" " When I saw the description of the male protagonist, I sincerely gave the author a thumbs up. The description of the male protagonist's appearance was precise and unnecessary. After reading so many articles, such level of appearance description is really rare. "He was dressed in a blue shirt, with his hair bound in blue silk, and his face was filled with ink. His eyes are as beautiful as jade, with a bit of anger quenched in the cold air, and his tall and tall figure makes him look like a handsome young man. "One sentence highlights the character's clothing, appearance, mood swings, and vaguely points out certain personality traits. This kind of description is excellent! From the lines in the text, we can see the author's careful use of words. This is a very good habit. Regularly refining the word choice, subconsciously using various modification techniques in sentences, and paying attention to the sense of picture are all good ways to improve the level of writing. However, I would like to remind the author not to deliberately replace common words with unfamiliar and gorgeous words. This will only have the opposite effect and make readers feel a little artificial. In addition, it may misinterpret the original meaning and the words do not convey the meaning. Please pay attention! By the way, I would like to ask the author if he has obsessive-compulsive disorder. . . . The rhythm of this topic really makes Waguang and I, who have obsessive-compulsive disorder, feel very good about it! ! ! Please allow the author to give me a kiss (get out... Above ~ I hope these suggestions can be of substantial help!

Miao Miao has been writing this article for about a year. Huang Sang and I went on tour incognito in the second year and came here again

Come on;-) Spread flowers~

La la la, come on, come on, work harder, I'll chase you

Come on^O^Spread flowers

Why can't I open the last chapter... Come on come on come on come on ah ah ah ah

Haha, I was surprised to see this post and came here to spread flowers. Su Yin is very loving

Spread flowers~Finally updated, I was so moved that I cried and fainted in the toilet

Is this a trap╭(╯ε╰)╮