I Suspect Someone Is Watching Me

When it rains, I always happen to find someone selling five-yuan umbrellas.

At business dinners, I always seem to find a cheap designated driver.

Things I lose always turn up again.

Anyone who's ever bullied me ends up having bad luck.

And then there's that feeling of being watched.

I suspect someone's spying on me.

And the person watching me... is a psycho who's in love with me.

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