[Western Crossover] His Dad Doesn't Like Me

You have a friend with black hair and blue eyes.

One day, he suddenly tells you he can no longer stand being an assistant. He's running away from home.

Fired up with righteous anger, you come to his aid. Gotham's richest man is no big deal. You're just going to teach your friend a lesson

His dad is terrifying. Next time, you should make friends with someone whose parents are both dead.

*

You have a friend with black hair and blue eyes.

One day, he suddenly tells you he was caught stealing red-handed and is going to be sent to a terrible boarding school.

Fired up with righteous anger, you come to his aid. A teenage crime boss is no big deal. You're just rescuing your friend

Why has that guy adopted your friend again?! Can't he go have a kid of his own?! Next time, you should make friends with someone whose parents are both alive.

*

You have a friend with black hair and blue eyes.

One day, he suddenly tells you he's uncovered a shocking secret and needs your help to head off a potential crisis.

Fired up with righteous anger, you come to his aid. Fending off one or two supervillains is no big deal. You're just helping your friend get the attention of that Bat

Why is it Batman again?! Does he recruit all your friends?

You've had enough of Gothamites. Next time, you'll make friends with someone from out of town whose father isn't Batman.

*

You have a friend with black hair and blue eyes.

One day, he suddenly tells you he has two fathers. One once wanted to destroy him, and the other can barely accept that he exists.

Fired up with righteous anger, you come to his aid. They're just two humans who gave your friend his genes. You're only teaching them a little lesson. Surely this time Batman has nothing to do with it

Great. Now both Superman and Lex Luthor want to beat you up. Metropolis really isn't a nice place.

*

This can't possibly be your fault. The real problem is that black hair and blue eyes are an ominous combination. Those kind, thoughtful, charming friends are all traps laid by their evil fathers.

You gaze gloomily at the little kid in front of you, who has black hair and green eyes and is shouting that he'll chop you to pieces.

This one should be fine, right? At least Batman definitely won't adopt him.

*

#That year, Gotham was gloomy and rainy, and you told me your dad was Batman#

#That year, Metropolis was sunny and bright. Your first dad wanted to shove me into a prison in a pocket universe, and your second dad wanted to kick me out of three-dimensional space#

Tagged as romance because there are some romantic scenes, but it's not clear whether there'll be a male lead. Judging by the ending I have in mind, it might be Batman.

This is probably something I'll write in my next life. Before reading, please make sure you've read at least one story by Lovecraft. Otherwise, by the time you reach the ending, you may want to flatten the author into a pancake.

Theme: We'll be best friends for life, right? Why is your dad treating me like this!