A Widow’s Diary

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Cen Nianyin was sold as a child to a lame old widower in the mountains. Deep in the wilderness, Yin Niang tried to escape for ten years, but never made it out.

The neighbors said the old widower had been a hunter in his youth, strong as an ox.

They advised her to behave and wait until he died. After that, she could enjoy herself however she pleased.

Later, when Yin Niang was twenty-two, a pale-faced scholar came to their impoverished county. He was radiant, with muscular arms and a broad chest and abdomen.

Unfortunately, both his eyes and legs were injured.

Yin Niang fell for him at first sight and secretly hid him in the back hills.

When he behaved, she fed him. When he was disobedient, she disciplined him.

His fair skin had to be tanned, his soft hands had to pull weeds, and his neat appearance had to be dirtied.

She made sure he was thoroughly disheveled, just like her, so he couldn't be seen in public.

The half-paralyzed old widower laughed and asked if she was so happy because she was hoping he would die soon.

Yin Niang laughed without replying, then tossed the leftover slop her sweetheart hadn't finished a few days earlier in front of the old widower. "It's not going to kill you."

And so she happily looked forward to the days ahead.

In time, the humiliation turned into tenderness.

Yin Niang visited more often, sometimes staying with him all night, sometimes not coming home all day.

Yin Niang would gaze into space and chatter away. The man never said a word, but he always smiled when he listened to her.

The longer she watched him, the more she liked him.

But she had to uphold a woman's virtue.

Looking and touching weren't against the law. For the blind man, their skin pressed close only to help heal his injuries.

One day, Yin Niang went to the back hills as usual. The pale-faced scholar gave her a storybook, filled with tales of life's joys and sorrows, love and hatred, murder and arson.

Yin Niang read it with great interest.

Until the word "widow" caught her eye.

So that was how colorful a widow's life could be.

She thought that once the old widower died, she would bring the pale-faced scholar home...

Later, Yin Niang steeled herself and gave the old widower a potent dose of medicine. He died that very night, and his funeral lasted two days.

On the third day, Yin Niang used his savings to buy herself a gorgeous red dress. Full of anticipation, she put it on and went to see the man.

From then on, he would have a home of his own too.

But when she arrived, the pale-faced scholar was gone.

Yin Niang cried for a month.

The neighbors thought she had loved the old widower deeply and advised her, "You're young and beautiful, Yin Niang. You shouldn't spend your life a widow."

So Yin Niang took the few dozen taels of silver she had and left the mountains.

Jinzhou was paved with gold, and everyone there was beautiful. Uneasy, Yin Niang just wanted to settle down.

Wherever there was work, Yin Niang went to apply.

Until someone recommended her for a job as a laundress.

"You seem quick and capable. From now on, I'll leave all the laundry in this household to you," said the steward of a grand estate.

Yin Niang was overjoyed and secretly vowed to do her very best.

Only, there were fewer and fewer clothes to wash each day, and fine skin cream began to appear.

The master of the estate grew increasingly demanding. He even wanted her to come into his room and serve him in person.

In the dim light, she could just make out his face. It was the pale-faced young man.

He was even going to take her home to meet his parents, and have her whisper "little uncle" in his ear...

P.S. Younger man, one-on-one. The woman is a virgin; the man is not.

Both leads are dark, one openly and one in secret.

The male lead is darker still.

Theme: Admiration is the greatest expression of love