Your Majesty, Why Are You Like This?

[So what if I hold a knife to the back of his heart? It's not like I stopped loving him.]

[Xie Heng's POV]

In his previous life, he was loyal to the emperor and devoted to his country, only to be rewarded with a cup of poisoned wine by the young emperor.

This time, he was determined to climb higher, faster, and more decisively, and make sure the young emperor never knew a moment's peace.

But he realized the young emperor was acting strangely. He took one step forward, and His Majesty retreated three; he dug a pit, and His Majesty buried it, then even jumped on top to pack it down.

Xie Heng: Excellent. His Majesty must have been reborn too. He's playing a game of wits with me.

But what was even stranger was...

When the young emperor was ambushed and fell into the water at Lushui, he jumped in without hesitation to save Xie Heng.

When Xie Heng had a fever in his sleep, the young emperor stayed by his bedside all night.

So Xie Heng hid his sharp edge and pretended to be gentle and refined. He even picked up a ruler himself, ready to teach this "reborn" emperor the true art of ruling.

One day, while going along with the young emperor's plan to "confine" him, Xie Heng instead cornered him in the imperial study.

Xie Heng: Your Majesty, have you been avoiding me lately?

He held the ruler in one hand and wrapped the other around the young emperor's waist. Xiao Jing trembled in his arms, yet his fingers were still trying to undo Xie Heng's belt.

Xie Heng lightly tapped Xiao Jing's cheek with the ruler. "What is it, Your Majesty? Are you afraid... or excited? Why don't we find out tonight?"

[Xiao Jing's POV]

On his first day after transmigrating into a book, Xiao Jing found himself in a nightmarish situation and wanted to leave a one-star review. His only golden finger was knowing he was destined to die at the hands of the treacherous minister Xie Heng.

So he stayed up all night studying a pirated copy of The Art of Imperial Rule.

The next day, with trembling legs, he indignantly overturned the first piece on Xie Heng's political chessboard.

Who cared about the game? Flip the board, and no one can play.

But Xie Heng only had to glance at him for Xiao Jing to get nervous and bristle all over.

From then on, whenever Xie Heng took a step forward, Xiao Jing retreated three; whenever Xie Heng pushed someone into a pit, Xiao Jing sent them a thousand miles away.

Whenever Xie Heng showed signs of gaining power, Xiao Jing frantically showered him with rewards while stripping away his real authority.

The officials in court all said the emperor was capricious and treated worthy men coldly.

Only Xiao Jing knew that at night, his dreams were filled with that alluring face, sword in hand, forcing him to abdicate.

Before Xiao Jing transmigrated into the book, Xie Heng was its dazzling bright moon. Afterward, he became a thorn in his heart.

He couldn't bear to pull it out, but leaving it there hurt and itched. His fate was in peril.

Only if he sat securely on the throne and kept the moon firmly in his grasp could he feel at ease.

But Xie Heng seemed... less and less like the character in the book.

He wasn't in a hurry to seize power. Instead, he picked up a ruler and wanted to teach Xiao Jing the art of imperial rule.

Xiao Jing felt a chill run down his spine. Xie, you dog, what kind of regicide are you plotting now?

One day, he planned to tempt Xie Heng with "five social insurances and a housing fund" and a "retirement plan for powerful ministers."

But Xie Heng paid no attention to his management theories and simply picked up the memorial recommending candidates for the imperial harem.

He tapped Xiao Jing's cheek and asked, "Your Majesty, I'm only in my twenties. Do I already look old?"

In his panic, Xiao Jing's fingers tightened around Xie Heng's belt. With a rip, it came right off.

Xiao Jing: ...Lord Xie, would you believe me if I said the belt did it by itself?

Xie Heng: Heh...

Xiao Jing resigned himself and closed his eyes. I'm done for... Xie Heng probably really has no intention of letting me go...

-

Reader's Guide:

1. Both are each other's first and only, happy ending, older top, master and disciple, sworn enemies, both powerful (the top isn't weak, he just acts like it early on), handsome top and handsome bottom, slow burn, psychological games, sweet and angsty, plot and romance. Not for readers with extreme preferences.

2. Gentle, scheming powerful minister with devoted-husband vibes x proud, highborn emperor with a sharp tongue and a character arc

3. Please give them a little time to grow, I beg you.

4. Mismatched information, mismatched information, mismatched information! Repeating it three times because it's important.

5. The story is mainly told from Xie Heng's perspective, but leans toward dual POV. The truth is gradually revealed.

6. The blurb includes both POVs, labeled [Name's POV]. Which one comes first depends on what works best for promotion. The top and bottom never switch roles throughout the story.

----Upcoming novel: Pretty Dodder Vine Loots the Immortal Sect

[He thought I was keeping accounts. I thought he was in love with me.]

Wen Qinglian is a dodder vine, famous among the outer disciples for picking up junk, being sweet and adorable, flattering people, and making a profit. He has just one principle: no feelings, only returns.

After all... relying on people is less useful than scrounging. Once he's done scrounging from you, he'll scrounge from your friends. Senior brothers and sisters, junior brothers and sisters, don't worry. Everyone gets a turn.

Better to pick things up than scrounge from others. If he's touched it, it's his. His dream is to one day scrounge the immortal sect clean by collecting junk.

Then he found a "piece of junk" in the back mountains, with every bone broken and his face ruined. Wen Qinglian's eyes lit up: Top-grade silkworm thread!

His vines wrapped around the man's waist before he could, pulling him into his arms. His abacus clicked away as he said, "Senior Brother, if you die, how about naming me as your heir?"

Ji Wumian: ...Junior Brother, maybe I can still be saved?

The former senior brother of the sect had excellent talent and great abilities. Then the sect fell, and everyone cursed him.

Wen Qinglian declared: "You're all fair-weather friends, worthless!"

Later, the tide turned. The sect welcomed a new "senior brother," and he was filthy rich.

Wen Qinglian immediately changed his tune, smiling sweetly and sincerely. "The former senior brother? A hypocrite, worth less than a penny!"

But can someone tell him why the current senior brother is the same person as the former one, who is also the "piece of junk" he brought home?

A voice choked with fate: "Junior Brother, say that again?"

Wen Qinglian: ...Help, I thought you were my money tree, but you think I'm your wife?

He was keeping accounts, not falling in love. But his vines were out of control, secretly winding around his senior brother's waist and tightening. The tables had turned.

Wen Qinglian kept a serious face and restrained his vines as he bargained. "Senior Brother, go easy on me... can I be on top?"

[Ji Wumian's POV]

Ji Wumian was once the immortal sect's untouchable "moonlight" senior brother.

After being framed, he lost his cultivation and his looks, and had no choice but to hide behind his junior brother.

He waited for Wen Qinglian to learn the truth about those "things" and treat him like everyone else: with disgust, fear, or cheap pity.

Instead, he saw Wen Qinglian come home every day humming, carrying a huge pile of treasures others had given him, and mumbling:

"Don't worry, Senior Brother. Even though your talent is worse than mine, your emotional intelligence is lower, you're not as good-looking as me, and your personality isn't very likable..."

"I fool around with everyone else, but I'm sincere with you."

Ji Wumian: ...Heh.

At first, Ji Wumian thought Wen Qinglian only had a sweet face, but was a greedy, hypocritical fool who would do anything for profit.

But when his injuries became unbearable, Wen Qinglian stayed up all night and spent his hard-earned stash of junk on his treatment.

When everyone abandoned and forgot him, Wen Qinglian came running over every day, excited to share what treasures he'd "scrounged" that time.

Ji Wumian understood: his junior brother had surely fallen deeply in love with him!

One day, he would rise with the wind and cut down every scoundrel.

"Senior Brother." The boy's eyes sparkled as he handed him half a spirit fruit he'd found. He clicked his abacus as he said, "I've done the math. Raising you has cost me thirty top-grade spirit stones more than the clothes and jade pendants you had on you are worth."

Ji Wumian gave an inscrutable little laugh. "And?"

"So you have to live a little longer, until I've made my money back."

Ji Wumian glanced at the vines wrapped tightly around his limbs, his eyes reddening as he fought to catch his breath. "But haven't I already..."

Before he could finish, the vines tightened and dragged him closer.

[Short Scenes]

Wen Qinglian (seriously keeping accounts): Medical fees, spirit herb fees, emotional damages... Tsk, I'm down thirty spirit stones.

Ji Wumian (thinking): He's spent everything he has on me. He must be deeply in love.

Wen Qinglian (smiling at his senior sister): Senior Sister, I really like you so much.

Ji Wumian (crushing a tree trunk): He's making me jealous on purpose. He just wants my attention.

Wen Qinglian (hoisting his little bundle): I shall become the king of the junkyard!

Ji Wumian (grabbing him by the collar): What king? Take care of my little treasury first.

Reader's Guide:

1. Happy ending, sweet romance, comedy, both are each other's first and only.

2. A famous playboy who collects junk and loves to bait people x an icy, domineering genius who thinks he's following the script but is actually falling for him

3. Not a typical weak character; both are powerful at heart. Wen's storyline is about collecting junk and scrounging, Ji's is about revenge as a domineering genius.

The blurb was screenshotted on January 13, 2025.

Theme: Peaceful lands, clear rivers, and people living and working in contentment.