The Entire Court Is Racking Its Brains over My Immortal Persona

After transmigrating, Rong Qi became the sixth prince of the Great Jin Dynasty and got bound to a fortune-telling System.

From birth dates and astrological charts to waist and leg measurements, not a single secret of the court officials was hidden from him.

He thought he would spend his days pretending to be an all-knowing immortal, living it up as a spoiled prince and enjoying a life of luxury.

But it turned out the original owner was an impostor, and his life was in danger at any moment.

And there was worse news: the System had undergone an unknown evolution. It had gained some useful features, but also plenty of mysterious bugs.

Rong Qi: ...

Oh well, I'm giving up. I'm going to die sooner or later anyway, so I might as well go wild!

-

In the sixteenth year of Emperor Xuande's reign in Great Jin, the assembled officials were startled at a palace banquet by the blaring voice of a celestial immortal

[The Empress Dowager's marriage palace... Hahaha, she cheated on the late emperor! Oh my god, the emperor isn't the late emperor's son!]

The emperor, who had jumped to his feet thinking it was divine punishment: ???

[The third prince is about to be made crown prince? But... Sigh, Great Jin is doomed! The fourth prince won't do either. His philtrum is too shallow, so he must have a problem down there... The fifth prince seems to like men? And the seventh prince too... Haha, I know who's best suited to be emperor!]

The princes, horrified, their ears all pricked up: Who!?

[The treacherous chancellor has dark circles under his eyes, clearly from too much sex, but his children palace is rosy. Wow, he's fifty and can still father a child! Huh? Wasn't he supposedly impotent and unable to have children? Tsk, this pregnancy is definitely going to go wrong!]

The treacherous chancellor: What's going to go wrong! Immortal above, I beg you!

When the officials realized the immortal was Rong Qi, they were consumed by murderous intent. At court, they rubbed their hands together, waiting for the perfect moment to detonate the bombshell about his origins.

Rong Qi, scrolling through the System because he had nothing to do: [My elixir of immortality for fooling the emperor failed again, but I successfully invented powerful gunpowder! I'm going to blow up all those bastards at court who keep talking about me behind my back!]

The officials preparing to impeach Rong Qi: Is he even human?

The emperor and generals, worried about their new weapons: He's a god, isn't he!

No one dared breathe too loudly as they waited for Rong Qi to reveal his method.

But Rong Qi sighed: [My archery and riding skills are below par, and my allowance got cut again. I need to plan for my future. Should I try growing potatoes that yield a thousand jin per mu?]

The officials: Yes, yes, please! [hungry baby.jpg]

[While I still remember things, I should hurry up and write some books: A Detailed Look at the Thirty-Six Super Projects of the Dynasties, How to Scientifically Manage Salt and Iron, and How to Build a Prosperous Great Jin While Promoting Handicrafts... But I'm so tired. I haven't even finished copying the books Fourth Brother assigned me. I'll do it later.]

The emperor and the assembled officials screamed in unison.

The fourth prince dropped to his knees with a thump.

[??? Why do they keep looking at me like they want to say something, but they're both delighted and miserable? Help! These old perverts! I don't want to live anymore!]

The assembled officials: ...? ...!!!

The next morning, a rumor spread like wildfire:

Shock! The entire court has castrated itself!

*This is a fictional setting. Everything serves the plot~

Coming soon: A First-Rate Fortune Teller [Mysticism]. Please add it to your favorites~

Meng Tan suddenly awakened the ability to read people's fortunes.

From then on, he left behind his carefree life as a rich young man of the capital, doted on by his whole family, and distanced himself from the comedy stage he loved most. He spent his days braving wind and rain to dabble in superstition, racing down the path of a fortune teller.

From then on, Meng Tan acquired many nicknames in the underworld.

The "show-off king" to people in the mystic arts

The "master" to his friends in the entertainment industry

The "genius at solving murder cases" cherished by the police

The "medium" to his Western business partners

The "greatest goofball celestial master in history," as voted by netizens

Meng Tan's response:

The Meng Tan brand of celestial masters is an internationally famous trademark. Everyone who's tried it says it's great.

[If there can only be one true god in the twenty-first century, you should know who it is without me having to say.]

Time Magazine: Meng Tan Edition

Theme: Even in adversity, face the world with optimism