After transmigrating into the cultivation world, Lin Xuan discovered that his Complete Guide to Cultivation Basics was a knockoff.
Other people’s annotations were proper and serious. His... were all filthy jokes.
[Drawing qi into your body? Sitting with your five hearts facing the sky is like being constipated. Try standing on your head.]
He tried drawing qi while standing on his head, and the spiritual energy went straight for the soles of his feet.
[Swordsmanship should be dignified and honorable? Bosh! Groin strikes, throwing dust, stomping on toes: that’s good swordsmanship!]
He swung his sword with a low strike, and his senior brother clutched his backside and bounced into the sky.
Later, he discovered that the book could also put idioms into practice:
Use “scared shitless” on a bully, and they’d be publicly humiliated on the spot.
Use “draw a circle on the ground and be imprisoned” on a monster, and it would earnestly start drawing a circle.
Use “heart as still as water” on an immortal maiden... and he’d pull out a fishing rod.
The sect elders lamented bitterly, “This lad’s way of cultivation is bizarre and underhanded!”
The demonic overlord flew into a rage. “Why are his divine abilities so filthy and impossible to guard against?!”
The immortal maidens blushed scarlet. “H-he used an idiom on me... Eek!”
Then the world-ending tribulation arrived, a ten-thousand-foot thunder dragon devouring heaven and earth.
As the whole world watched in despair, Lin Xuan took a step forward and unleashed his ultimate interpretation of the tribulation:
“Take this: **
Dragon! Drop! Ten! Palms!
”** This is a hilarious story about carving out an absurd path to power in a serious cultivation world through “misunderstandings” and “misusing idioms.”
So, what kind of “interpretation” would you like today?
