Running Wild: The Great Warlords of the Three Kingdoms Are All My Dads

【Straight-faced comedy + satisfying read + the wildest of unofficial histories + happy ending】 Du Xiu transmigrates to the late Eastern Han dynasty and awakens a System that lets him claim fathers. Following the System’s prompts, Du Xiu can name any powerful figure in the land as his father and receive rewards. Zhang Jue: “Your father is gravely ill, my son. Hurry and cut off my head so you can claim the reward!” Dong Zhuo: “Who says I, Dong Zhuo, have no heir? I have a son named Du Xiu. He has earned Gongsun Zan’s complete trust.” Gongsun Zan: “I have an eldest son named Du Xiu. The troops of Liangzhou are already in his hands.” Ma Teng: “Chao, you must listen to your elder brother, Du Xiu.” Liu Bei: “Governor Liu, Du Xiu has his eye on Jingzhou. Lend me thirty thousand troops, and I can help you get rid of this thorn in your side.” Liu Biao: “You little Liu Bei, you dare harm my son? Drag him out and execute him!”