Slay the Gods: A Patient, Lend Me Your Blade to Kill a God

Lin Qiye thinks there's something a little off about the psychiatric hospital he's in.

The other patients either count floor tiles or give speeches to the air. Zhao Kongcheng, in the bed beside his, clutches a rusty cleaver every day and mutters, “You learn to chop wood before you can slay gods.” Across the hall, Su Qingyuan is always tying red string around a mop in the middle of the night, saying she wants to “catch a Night Wanderer and keep it as a pet.”

Then one day, a blood-red moon rises above the treetops. The director, wearing a patient gown and carrying a Guan Yu-style broadsword, stands on the rooftop and roars at the demons filling the sky. “It's time for your meds... I mean, time to slay gods!”

Only then does Lin Qiye realize: Am I really the only one in this madhouse who wants to get proper treatment?

As the other patients charge out with spatulas and cleavers to hack at the gods, he quietly pulls out the medical records he'd hidden away. Wait, I think I picked up the wrong discharge diagnosis. Why does this say “Chief Physician, Godslayer Department”?!

From then on, life at the psychiatric hospital goes like this:

“Zhao Kongcheng, don't peel apples with that cleaver! It once slew an evil god from beyond the realms!”

“Su Qingyuan, put away those red strings! The director's red long johns are about to become your sacrifice!”

“And you, Lin Qiye! Stop staring at a god's head and muttering, ‘Those symptoms seem familiar.’ It might bite you!”

A bunch of godslayers carrying psychiatric diagnoses teeter back and forth on the edge of sanity and madness. Today they beat an ancient demon god to tears; tomorrow they get into a brawl over the last piece of braised pork in the cafeteria. What can you say? Godslayers from a psychiatric hospital are just that absurd, yet dependable!