I Carry the Entire Immortal Sect by Slacking Off

After working myself to death at my desk as a 996 office drone, I somehow ended up in the cultivation world, where the System warned me: "If you keep working this hard, you'll drop dead on the spot!"

To stay alive, I, Su Lan, had no choice but to resign myself to slacking off. From then on, I clung to one unshakable truth: "Hard work will kill you; slacking off is the way to ascension."

I thought I could spend the rest of my days happily lazing around, but something about this sect... seemed a little off!

Every senior brother I picked up was a pitiful, powerful beauty doomed to die at the hands of the original story:

a BUG-level sword cultivator who had given up on life and was waiting to die, a crazed alchemist obsessed with love, a violent half-demon crippled by insecurity and social anxiety, and a stuffy scholar clutching three hundred sect rules and demanding to implement "performance reviews"...

In the end, I bamboozled every last one of them with my "Guide to Workplace Manipulation and Fighting Back," "Project Risk Assessment Report," and "A Few Suggestions for Improving Core Competitiveness"! They watched me sleep and sunbathe every day, and not only did they have no complaints, they all imagined I was a hidden master who had come down to experience the mortal world and enlighten them!

"Junior Sister isn't sleeping. She's attaining the Dao in her dreams!"

"Junior Sister isn't cursing anyone out. She's severing my inner demons!"

"Junior Sister isn't slacking off. She's expounding the supreme Dao of governing through non-action!"

Just as the sect was growing stronger and stronger under my "leadership," and we were on the verge of achieving the ultimate goal of "financial freedom and early retirement," I discovered that the Heavenly Dao of this world was a KPI-obsessed workaholic who despised slacking off!

Fine. If you won't let me lie down, I'll make you crash!

This isn't just a cultivation story. It's every worker's voice, at last!