The Abyssal Elevator: True Tales of All-Female Hauntings

[Welcome to the all-female survival reality show! The prize is staying alive.] Rule 1: Get along lovingly with your randomly assigned teammates. Rule 2: If you hear crying from the ceiling, feed it chocolate. Rule 3: Don’t ask why Tong You’s game console can smash ghosts. Written by Jiang Jiu on the title page of The Abyss Elevator Survival Guide When a suspended detective, a rock-loving medical student, and a hacker loli are shoved into a man-eating elevator, they choose: A. Use profiling to find loopholes in the rules (Song Ling) B. Hit the monsters with dolphin-like high notes (Jiang Jiu) C. Treat paranormal phenomena as program bugs (Tong You) D. All of the above, while earning a barrage of viewers worldwide screaming, “Wife!” Friendly reminder: This program has a 63% death rate. Survivors will receive a “National Fortune Gift Pack,” including but not limited to mysteriously sweeter air, faster Wi-Fi, and other supernatural perks. [Feel free to suggest any kind of instance you’d like me to write. No limits on the subject matter. Just tell me and I’ll write it.]