In the first year of the Zhenguan era, Lu Changan, a graduate student in materials science, opens his eyes to find himself crouching in Chang’an’s western market, with a homemade copper pot in front of him. When Li Shimin, traveling incognito, is drawn over by the spicy aroma, Lu Changan blurts out, “Your Majesty, stir the sesame sauce clockwise exactly thirty-six times…”
With chili oil and a divided hot pot, Lu’s Eatery takes Chang’an by storm in just three months. Cheng Yaojin sneaks in to steal the hot pot base and gets knocked out by the spice. The Ministry of Revenue mistakes Arabic numerals for demonic symbols. Persian merchants trade luminous pearls for membership cards. Then Princess Jinyang, Li Mingda, kicks open the kitchen door in men’s clothes and says, “Shopkeeper Lu, Father asks if you’d also like to solve the imperial treasury’s deficit.”
And so the story takes a sharp turn:
In a cotton field, old farmers cry that “white-haired demons are sucking the strength from the soil,” while Lu Changan sets up a water-powered cotton gin.
In the Taiji Palace, a Turkic envoy threatens war, only to be driven off by a flamethrower fueled by liquor.
At a glass auction, the Five Surnames and Seven Clans bankrupt themselves over a single transparent teacup…
As Li Shimin gazes pensively at a prototype steam engine, Lu Changan is busy hiding his last jar of chili sauce. “Your Majesty, this one really can’t be mass-produced…”
