After Failing to Ascend, Seven Exes Urge Me to Become a Dad

Hilarious cultivation + a harem showdown while raising kids + System + playing the fool while hiding one's strength

On the day Chu You ascends to immortality, the Heavenly Dao suddenly displays a notification: “Family ties are missing from your fate chart. We have detected that you have a son and a daughter lost in the mortal world. Ascension is impossible.”

The Immortal Venerable is stunned. “I’ve been pure as jade for a thousand years. Where did these kids come from?!”

The System is furious. “You had dual cultivation with seven people, and you call that pure as jade?”

Chu You finally understands. Someone secretly had his kids, and now he’s been stuck with the mess! Who could their mother be?

He starts counting on his fingers. “Leng Qingqiu, the head of Sword Pavilion; Hua Xiangrong, the Holy Maiden of the Demon Harmony Sect; Bai Zhi, heir to Medicine King Valley...”

“System, can you tell this Venerable who the kids’ mother is?”

“No. Go ask them one by one yourself.”

Seven exes, one chaotic showdown, and every kid is a handful.

The Sichuan-girl System curses away: “Ai ya, your kid’s caused trouble again!”

Others cultivate immortality. I raise kids...

“What the heck? You want me, a great Immortal Venerable, to raise children?”

The System answers in a thick Sichuan accent: “That’s right, exactly...”