Back to Eighteen, You Green-Tea Campus Queen Aren’t Good Enough for Me

“When I like you, whatever you say goes. When I don’t like you anymore, who do you think you are?” Tang Song jolted awake and realized he’d only fallen asleep during class in his senior year of high school. Had everything he’d experienced before just been a dream? Summer, 2012. Eighteen years old. The evening breeze was warm, and youth ran wild. This was a time when “your wife” and “your husband” weren’t yet the most vicious curses. Wang Po hadn’t become famous, and nobody stood onstage bossing people around and reminding boys and girls to open their eyes to the world. At the peak of their vigor, their prostates hadn’t calcified. They didn’t have to stand in the bathroom for ten seconds, unable to pee, plagued by frequent, urgent, incomplete urination. With drool all over his desk, Tang Song excitedly told his deskmate he’d had an incredibly long nightmare. His best buddy sneered and called him an idiot. Unfazed, Tang Song looked out at the school playground. Everything was still so familiar. Everything was still beautiful. There was still time…