I Asked You to Introduce Your Dad, Not Read Out His Rap Sheet

At her speech, a little girl proudly declared, "My dad is a thief, and I want to be one when I grow up, too."

Everyone was left speechless!

The little girl went right on to recite her dad's "rap sheet"!

He secretly brought home all the Chinese antiques and cultural relics from that museum in the land of John Bull, the one that makes people from the Dragon Kingdom cry when they go in and come out.

He even stole two of the Eagle Sauce's nuclear missiles and brought them back so people could play around with launching them.

And he stole the swords enshrined at the national shrine of the Island Nation and stuck them in the outhouse.

And so on...

The whole Dragon Kingdom was stunned: We want to be thieves like that, too!

Just when everyone thought that was the end of it,

the little girl changed her tune!

Dad also has a huge arms factory!

The whole internet: That rap sheet is a little scary!

This novel and its characters are entirely fictional. Any resemblance to real people or events is purely coincidental. Do not imitate.