They say that everyone in Heaven has a clock that represents their lifespan.
Some clocks run fast, and the people they represent grow old quickly.
Some clocks run slowly, and the people they represent grow old slowly.
Some clocks don't move at all...
But the clock representing Sakai Kagi is rather special...
Perhaps the God of Time connected its gears to the axle of a washing machine drum. His clock sometimes runs forward and sometimes backward, and it alternates between running and stopping. When it runs, it races; when it stops, it stays still for quite a while.
As a result, Sakai Kagi's age sometimes increases, sometimes decreases, sometimes stays steady long enough for him to catch his breath, and sometimes changes so suddenly that he is completely caught off guard.
His love life, too, is crushed beneath the wheel of time's inscrutable chariot, ground to dust...
When he confessed to his fourteen-year-old middle school deskmate, he turned into a burly forty-five-year-old man.
When he confessed to a thirty-year-old teacher, he turned into a twelve-year-old grade schooler.
When he confessed to a ten-thousand-year-old dragon matriarch, he turned into a ninety-two-year-old man and promptly died in her embrace.
All he could do was raise his middle finger to the God of Time who had it in for him, tears of frustration in his eyes.
"You son of a bitch! Sooner or later, I'll spread my wings and soar right over your head!"
