"In my life, there are three things I never touch: first, the throne; second, political struggles; third, beautiful women, unless they can build flintlock guns!"
Shen Zhuo transmigrates to the Great Wei Dynasty. While everyone else fights for the throne, Shen Zhuo only wants to run a wholesale business, selling wholesale swords, spears, sabers, halberds, axes, hooks, and forks! While his younger brothers fight to the death at court, the Crown Prince is happily playing a real-life version of Minecraft on the northern frontier.
Crown Prince: "I have three thousand retainers!"
Shen Zhuo: "I have thirty thousand crossbows. Want to see their range?"
Emperor Yuan: "Son, lend your father some troops..."
Shen Zhuo: "Family discount: twenty percent off. Want to sign an arms lease first?"
That day, the Black Banner Army's iron hooves shattered the court. The rebel sat in his carriage, munching sunflower seeds. "I told you, all I wanted was to live a lazy life. You were the ones who forced me to become an arsenal!"
That day, foreign invaders crossed the border. The unhinged prince charged into the fray, undaunted by a million foes. "Today, I, Shen Zhuo, will defend the nation alone!"
That day, peace reigned across the land, and the dynasty endured for generations. The mighty ruler of that age smiled as he watched the seasons pass. "Nothing on the agenda today. Let's hit the pleasure quarter and listen to some music!"
