I, Yuta Kobayashi, received the ultimate bad news of my life: a "red card warning" from the Ministry of the Interior.
"Due to a prolonged lack of social contact with the opposite sex, you have been placed on the Romance Watchlist. If you have not been on three qualifying dates before graduation, you will be conscripted immediately."
I sprawled on the sofa and looked over at my childhood friend and maid, Rei Kannazuki, who was using the vacuum cleaner to "precisely attack" the area around my feet.
"Rei, the government is going to drag me off to dig potatoes."
"Oh? So the trash is finally getting sorted and disposed of?" she replied coldly, without turning around.
"...I mean, I might be sent to the army to dig potatoes for two years because I haven't dated anyone."
The vacuum cleaner fell silent.
She turned around, her skirt fluttering slightly. Her face remained expressionless, but a hint of barely perceptible hesitation flashed in her eyes.
"So?"
"So..." I took a deep breath. "Could you help me out by acting as my 'date'? Just once, that's all. Otherwise, I'll have to go on a date with a rifle."
After a long silence, Rei switched off the vacuum cleaner and took a leather notebook from her schoolbag. Its cover bore a family crest. It was her "maid's work log."
"Then our next date will be next Saturday. Please take it seriously. I would be very troubled if your incompetence led to me being held responsible for 'failure to provide adequate assistance.'"
She bowed slightly, and the corners of her mouth seemed to lift just a little.
"After all, sending an idiot like you to defend the country would be the real act of stupidity."
