The Strongest Kept Man on Earth

I'm a man determined to become the King of Free Meals. What, you want to duel me? Sure, get past my wife first. What? You want to take me out to dinner? Are you a rich older woman? If not, I might pass. I've lived my life recklessly, loving freedom. The only thing that could ever tie me down is a rich older woman. When you're young, you don't know the joys of living off a woman. You mistake your youth for a chance to plant rice seedlings. If only I could find a rich older woman to take care of me, I'd move into a mansion that very night.