The Eight Thieves of Nonsense

[Humor, absurdity, and comedy. This is not a true story. Everything in this book is made up, and none of the supernatural events have been scientifically proven.] My name is Hu San. My mother died in childbirth, and after that my father drank himself senseless and beat me at the drop of a hat. The villagers thought he'd beaten my brains out. I'd done plenty of foolish things, too, so they all called me Pi San. Then one day, by pure chance, I ran into two grave robbers. When I went back with them, I found they were just as poor as I was. There was also a strange Master Ma. The three of us couldn't scrape together a decent meal. The old man told me that when you're hungry, go to sleep. Once you're asleep, you won't be hungry anymore. I got a job serving tea and water at a bathhouse. Not only did it pay, but there were pretty women to look at. I thought my days of worry were over. But I got caught between a gang of grave robbers and the police, and had to talk my way between them. More absurdly still, I even became an undercover cop! Later, I told all this to my friends, and they all said I was talking nonsense. That's right, this book is called The Tall Tales of Hu San.