Me, a Defrocked Taoist, Vanquishing Demons in Norway

I'm a Taoist priest who returned to secular life. To escape blind dates, I ran off to Norway, a small country in Northern Europe, and got a job as a security guard. I thought I could enjoy a peaceful routine of patrolling at work and fishing after hours. That was until the day I ran into a blonde, blue-eyed beauty being attacked by a group of black-robed monsters on the streets of Oslo. She turned to me, baring her fangs, her voice trembling with tears. "Help! I'm a vampire, but I eat vegetables!" I silently took out my peachwood sword, thought it over, put it back in my bag, and swapped it for garlic and a cross. When in Rome, after all.