Douluo Dalu: At Shrek, I Do Whatever I Want

Su Xian accidentally transmigrates. From the start, he's blind and stranded in a poor mountain village.

Luckily, the villagers are all kindhearted.

The kindly old village chief always brings him fragrant wild-vegetable porridge and asks after his health.

Because the heavy rain keeps knocking out the power and internet, Su Xian decides to repay the villagers' care by reading aloud from the book of light reading he brought with him, Douluo Dalu, and roasting it mercilessly as he goes.

"Old village chief, let me tell you: Shrek Academy is run by a bunch of sanctimonious hypocrites!"

"That second-in-command at the Sea God Pavilion, Xuan Zi, is a complete cancer in Shrek. People always die when he's in charge, and whenever something happens, all he knows how to do is cry!"

"And Yu Xiaogang, that Grandmaster from the original generation? Without a transmigrator disciple carrying him, he's nothing but a complete clown!"

Su Xian rants to his heart's content, convinced he's brought great spiritual comfort to the people of the mountains.

Then, several months later, his sight finally returns.

He looks down at the Ten-Thousand-Year Soul-Nourishing Wood beneath him, at the Golden Tree hall all around him, glowing with holy golden light, and at the group of old men and women before him, each wearing nine Soul Rings...

Su Xian falls into deep thought.

[Classified Shrek Sea God Pavilion Records]

Xuan Zi: "Stop cursing me! I'll resign from every position right now! I'm a sinner for the ages!"

Yan Shaozhe: "Quick! Get some cloth and cover the Founder's statue! We absolutely cannot let this kid tell any more hellishly funny jokes!"

Mu En: "For the sake of Shrek's thousand-year legacy... Shaozhe, it's your turn to bring Mr. Su his foot-washing water today."