Eyes with Rain Flowing Through Them

Shen Shiwei's name is never on the honor list. She does her best in everything, but never stands in a place with light. Achievements, plans, budgets, processes, she is used to being the one who is needed, and is also used to not being seen. Only when you are needed can you be left behind. This is something she learned when she was six years old. And her world is not just hers. The partner who always used logic and sharpness to make her appear, the teacher who stood on the podium and said "I'm nervous about you" but didn't cross anything, the girl who was in the same dormitory with her and was a little too good to her - they looked at her, and in the process of her being seen, they each hid their own secrets. This is a slow recognition of "being needed" and "being loved". A girl who is accustomed to trading usefulness for a sense of security, in the autumn of her seventeenth year, began to learn that she doesn't have to be right all the time, doesn't have to be thoughtful about everything, and doesn't have to distinguish whether every drop of rain that flows into her eyes is rain or tears. A drop of rainwater flows into the eye. When it flows out, is it rainwater or tears? Maybe neither. Maybe it's a heavy rain that falls back into one's heart after one person gets wet for another person. But after the rain stopped, she didn't look back. It's not that I don't want to. It was she who finally knew that moving forward was her own direction.