The Guarantor of Destiny Also Wants to Resign Today

I, Chen Xian, just died and joined the "Destiny Fulfillment Company". Position: Guarantor of Destiny. Job number: 9527. Responsibilities: Ensure that each client goes through life according to the script. Sounds serious, right? But look at my workstation - CRT big ass monitor, WinXP system, chair with one wheel missing. There is a Buddha statue sitting at the workstation next door. His client is Sakyamuni. His trouble is that "the old man thinks that sentient beings are too noisy and almost stops teaching the Dharma." In the three days of induction training, I only learned one thing: the enter key in heaven looks exactly like the one in the mortal world. So when I took on the first task - to guarantee a programmer named Lin Mo to save the world - and my hand slipped and changed to "Save the Cats", it was too late. All the cats in the world spoke their first words at the same time: "Humans, from today on, you are responsible for shoveling shit, and we are responsible for ruling." Conditions for withdrawal: ① Customer voice command ② Cognitive relaxation of all human beings ≥ 51% ③ Cat people abandon the agreement. If it cannot be completed within 30 days, it will be permanently locked. My teammate: A programmer who is too afraid to speak into a microphone. My opponents: three cats holding a mahjong table council. My deadline: 29 days, 23 hours and 47 minutes. First day at work. I already want to resign. But the company stipulates that after becoming a full-time employee, he can retire after working for 99 years. I may need to survive these 30 days first.