Start Building the Past by Collecting Features

In order to avenge the old tramp who provided information to him, there is no objection to this. But is the protagonist's reaction too abrupt? And is the relationship between him and the old tramp that good? Personally, I feel that as a person who "knows that there is a 5% chance of being beaten to death when I go out tomorrow, so I don't go out all day." After learning that the old tramp died, he should first be scared or nervous (because he may have been exposed), feel threatened, and respond accordingly (go to divination to check the information to decide whether to strike first), and then learn that the old tramp did not expose himself until his death. I felt deeply and then added a reason for revenge. It's not that the time traveler can't take revenge for the person he meets, but the character doesn't fit in.

It's okay to learn writing and other things, but I feel quite happy watching the revenge for the old tramp. But the aristocratic test protagonist really left me speechless. The protagonist can only fight him if he is defeated. So how can he fight some ordinary extraordinary detectives? Especially as a detective, his most important thing is not force. Is his test of force a bit too abstract? Another protagonist would be too shabby. If the maid said there was no invitee, wouldn't it be okay for him to just leave?

I like the subject matter, but the protagonist tends to endure things when things happen, and is not very smart. There were no effective counterattacks in the follow-up, and I personally felt a little aggrieved.

It's very frustrating. The protagonist seems to be awesome, but it's very frustrating.

The old tramp is too out of place.

Advocate——Elizabeth

The subject matter is quite good, the writing style should be gradually improved. Friends who often read books may not be able to stand some parts. The emotional changes are too fast and abrupt, and there is no good preparation. Also, the pace is a bit fast. You can write a little more daily changes, but it requires a certain level. Come on.

It's a very interesting subject matter, but the author's writing skills are a little immature and some of the plot and writing are not very good, so I can accept it.

How can a mysterious side detective be like Mundo?

"Original"——"Louis Flood"

In Chapter 4, one second Charlotte asked the target if he was going out. The protagonist said that he was not going out because the door handle could not be turned. The next second he said that the door handle could not be turned. . . I don't know if this is a typo or something. It was the same before. The tramp clearly said that he heard about it when he was working on the ship, but the protagonist seemed not to hear it and asked him why he knew this as a tramp. . . It appears twice in just a few chapters, which really affects the viewing experience.

According to the title of the book, in the introduction, there are three gods whose herding status is higher than his own. I suggest the author change the "Old Days" in the title to match the introduction. Otherwise, in Azathoth's dream, the level of the three pillars of herding gods in the past would be a fart (Harmony speaks, please let it go. JPG

Morian Tias

My new book , new books are not easy. Please support each other, collect and read each other, and wish you an early signing!

"Original of Ashes"——"Karl Vlad"

If there is a book lover who likes this book, I hope you can help me to follow it every day. Please turn to the last page of the latest chapter so that I can follow it. I am really grateful!

Come on, come on, come on, I'll take care of you first.

Do you have any recommendations for novels with similar themes?

Give it a try, do you have a heroine or a harem?

It's Charlotte's

"Traveler"——"Irene Delica"

"Kingdom Gilgamesh"——"Lea Lancelot"

"The Daughter of Reincarnation" - "Meili" The characters are childhood and adult respectively

The author's writing style is still good, but I feel like the beginning part could use some work! The first part of Qianjin's visit to provide support is still a bit too sudden. If possible, it would be better to lay some groundwork. (After all, the earl is also a relatively big official. It would be better to talk about the number of failures before finding the protagonist through narration.) As well as the part about avenging the tramp, the emotional change is a bit sudden. It may be better to set up a few paragraphs. It's not that the moral standards are too high, that's okay, but you need to lay out the protagonist's personality first, and show that the protagonist is a good person through some things. It will be better when writing about revenge.