I Came Back from Dragon Ball and Became Hokage

The main reason is that you haven't done well with three books in a row, and you are an author I like very much, so I would like to share my opinion. I have read your two previous books, One Piece and Naruto. The one in Liuyuecheng was too slow to update and I had not read most of the worlds traveled through, so I had no sense of immersion. I only read the previous content. In the book "The Rise of the Human Race in the Age of Destruction", I did not read a word and only read the comments. I think from the comments in the book circle and the number of people on the book list , the number of monthly tickets, and the 52-word synopsis, the book was completed early. From these aspects, this book should be quite a failure, so I think most fans including me and you yourself should think that writing fan fiction is your strength, and originality is your weakness. The peak of your achievements is also the two books of Dark General and Konoha Light. It can be seen that you are in After the failure of the original novel, I started writing the book "I Returned from Dragon Ball and I Became Hokage" thinking that I was not suitable for original novels. I jumped into it as soon as I started writing it, but I still wanted to write a book, so I wanted to try to return to my comfort zone and write a fanfic first. But in fact, whether it is Liuyuecheng or the current "Return from Dragon Ball and I Become Hokage", these two "fanfictions" The scores in the novels are not very good. What I want to say is that your idea is wrong. Your comfort zone is not comprehensive comics at all. The comprehensive comics are fan fiction, but they are completely different from the dark generals and the light of Konoha, which you have the best grades. The comprehensive comics are not your comfort zone. Fan novels are also different. Single world fan fiction (this single world refers to the one here) One world, instead of changing the world every dozens of chapters. For example, in a One Piece fanfic, the protagonist's system is a lottery, and he draws Naruto's skills, which is also considered a single world) and comprehensive comics are not the same type of novels at all. Your comfort zone is a single-world fanfic, not a comprehensive comic Then let me summarize your strengths, First of all, you are very good at adapting original plots. For example, the three systems of immortals, gods, and monsters native to the ninja world that you adapted from Konoha Light are quite creative and indeed reasonable. You are also good at deducing the butterfly effect caused by the arrival of the protagonist. At least I don't see anything very unreasonable. Most of the dramas you have performed The plots are very reasonable and story-telling. For example, the plot of Dark General's "Devil Sword Apophis" contains many interesting points in the book. You are also good at the writing method of "Dihua". I believe most readers who have read your two books, Dark General and Konoha's Light, know it well. I won't go into details about this. You are also good at writing about wits. I think that at the average level and above, most of the writing is quite good, especially the layout of the protagonist. You are also good at genius flow and invincible flow. The protagonists in your books have quite high talents. If I remember correctly, you have said before that only when the protagonist's talents are high can he do things well. Otherwise, if the protagonist is weak, he will be able to do anything. There is no room for manipulation, (probably this is what I mean) and when you write a character with a clear personality, what you write is very consistent with the character's image. I will give you a few examples (Garp) (Tsunade) (Blackbeard). At the same time, you also adapted very well to this kind of character who has this character but there is very little description of the character in the original work, such as Mizuki and Jhin, these two adaptations are very good (One Piece Jhin had very few plots at that time. It would be great to think of changing him into a character who pushes into the city, and the subsequent development is very reasonable). In fact, Jhin is written by a completely different person from the original work. Mizuki is also a pure adaptation, and there is a big gap between it and the original work, but I don't feel disgusted at all. The main reason is that the character is written in such a three-dimensional way. Isn't that what I read the fanfic for? The main character travels through time and the plot remains the same, and all the characters' personalities and experiences remain unchanged. So why don't I read the original work? Of course, your original character is just a pure lump (Apophis is considered part of the protagonist, not a part of it) Original characters) Adaptation is your strength, originality is your weakness. Of course, the originality I am talking about is originality from scratch. You are still very good at adapting if you are given an outline of the world and a character outline. It allows you to create a world and several characters. That is your weakness Those are the things that come to mind for the moment, maybe you still have There are other strengths, but I really haven't thought about them now. In short, these are actually your real "comfort zone". The main reason for your success is your adaptation of the plot, your deduction of the butterfly effect of the protagonist, the protagonist's various wits and layouts in the plot, and the performance of the original character perfectly matches the character image. This These are the basis of your performance. These are all based on a ready-made world view and ready-made characters for you to adapt, so you are good at doujin. Then the genius flow, the invincible flow, and the Dihua are just your bonus points. With the bonus points, there is no impact, but it will not hurt your bones. They are just bonus points, and there is no ready-made world or ready-made characters for you. When you adapt it, you step out of your comfort zone. For example, your first fantasy book (I really forgot what it was called) is pure and simple. Your original novel, "The Rise of the Human Race in the Age of Destruction," is also pure and simple. And the full-length comic seems to be your comfort zone, but in fact it can only be half of it at most. If you are writing a full-length comic, is it a world? Only about a hundred pictures at most? Doesn't a book require at least 5 to 10 worlds to travel back and forth, so how can you use your strengths? How to adapt the plot in 100 chapters? How about the butterfly effect? It's only enough to fight one wave and run away, and you can visit a world twice at most. How to layout it? How many original characters can appear in 100 chapters? The space is so short, how many times can they appear? No matter how in line with the character image, he will only appear a few times anyway, and you will not be able to bring out your strengths in this area. As for the genius stream, invincible stream, and Dihua, as I said before, they are bonus points, not the foundation. There is no other foundation to build the foundation to more than 60 points. , Genius flow, Invincible flow, Dihua, just add a few points, you can't even reach the passing line of 60, and you can't support a book. On the surface, you are returning to the comfort zone. In fact, it is half of the comfort zone at most. In fact, this is also the case. The book "Hai" you wrote in the comfort zone "The Dark General of Thieves" and "The Light of Konoha" are your best books. "The World Begins from Liuyue City" and "I Become Hokage After Returning from Dragon Ball" which are within half of your comfort zone can only be said to be a little better than a complete rush. Compared with your best books, the results are much worse, and completely The book "The Rise of the Human Race in the Age of Destruction" written out of the comfort zone is completely pure and simple. Basically 9 out of 10 people in the book circle are saying that this book is not good, and no one has read it. Why is no one reading it? Why are the old fans reading it also saying that this book is not good? It's because you have thrown away all the things you are good at and are simply stepping out of your comfort zone to challenge what you are least good at. It's like asking you to write romance and asking you to only write emotional scenes with a few female protagonists. Can you do it? As for "The Rise of the Human Race in the Age of Destruction", do you really feel that there is a big difference between writing it and asking you to directly write romance? To be honest, if the author was not you, I would have no desire to read this book Finally, I want to say , I suggest that whether the book "I Returned from Dragon Ball and I Became Hokage" is finished or eunuch, after finishing it, if you want to open the next book, I suggest that your next book should be a fanfic of a single world, and return to your comfort zone first. It is actually quite torture to keep writing for such a long time, write so many books, and get such bad results, so I recommend you to return to your comfort zone and then write a fanfic. I recommend writing some fan fiction that has an audience, such as Pirates, Naruto, Douluo, and Pokémon (these examples are just to say that some people read them, not to say that they must be written). It is not recommended to write fan fiction like Death and Bone King at all. It has nothing to do with whether the original works are good or not. The main reason is that no one reads their fan fiction. I have never seen a successful fan novel about Death and Bone King, while Pirates and Fire There are so many achievements in Shadows, Douluo, and Pokémon that they are too numerous to count. Of course, if you want to use love to generate electricity, just pretend I didn't say it Then, I don't recommend you write Naruto, I recommend you write Pirates, you " The book "Light of Konoha" has actually written everything that can be written, and Naruto is actually a completed work. Now I can only write the content of the sequel Boruto or write system stories, or write about the protagonist who is not from Konoha? A protagonist of Uchiha origin? I guess you haven't read much of Boruto and you don't have the energy or interest to read it all in order to write a book. Moreover, the audience of Boruto is definitely much smaller than the audience of Naruto Shippuden. I don't think you like to write system stories. In fact, it is difficult to have any new ideas in the plot But if you write about pirates, there is still something to say. , Although "Dark General" is your peak book, you still have to write about One Piece from two aspects. First: One Piece is always updated. When you first wrote "Dark General", the plot of One Piece was much more updated than it is now. There is completely new stuff to write. As long as you complain more about the garbage plot of Wano written by Oda There are many people watching it, and then sorting out the plots other than these garbage plots, and writing around them. Compared with "Dark General", it is a completely new story Second: When writing a pirate fanfic, you can write about the navy, pirates, revolutionary army, and the three camps. "Dark General" in your navy style is the ceiling, but there are still pirates. , Revolutionary Army can be written. Although the first Pirates fanfic was about the Pirates camp, the setting has been completely different after many years, and the writing in that book was also average. It was not as good as the "Dark General" one, and it was far from reaching the ceiling So I suggest you open a Pirates fanfic where the protagonist is the Pirates lineup or the Revolutionary Army lineup.

Uchiha Madara did not betray Konoha. On the contrary, Konoha betrayed Uchiha Madara. Uchiha Madara was not a fool like Senju Hashirama. He left Konoha only after seeing clearly.

How well written Longinus was. The black goat who wanted to be the king of the world put on the white sheepskin of a saint-savior and deceived the whole world, and ascended the throne with everyone's blessings.

Why is it written like a manual, so dry?

I just want to complain about why fairy beans, omnipotent capsules, weight-bearing bracelets, qi, cave waves, and dancing sky skills are not weakened and invalidated. The immortal body is weakened. Why can people in the prisoner of delicious food be able to channel all the snakes normally?

I don't know whether it's because my requirements for the quality of books have improved in recent years, or whether your skills, as the author, have declined. Anyway, it doesn't work. The Dark General back then finished the book after seeing the ending, but gave up halfway through Light of Konoha. I can't even read the free part of this book, and I won't want to take advantage of it after the two-day limit. The Dark General once left a very good impression on me, so I hope to see a better version of you in the future.

I read it for the second time, and when I read Chapter 50, I remembered why I didn't continue reading last time, because I couldn't figure out why the transplantation of gourmet cells was arranged. Gourmet cells are very powerful, but they also have serious side effects, especially how many worlds can satisfy the delicacies of gourmet cells, and the author did not describe the idea of ​​removing the side effects of gourmet cells. Ming got Goku's hair and Piccolo's blood at the beginning. I couldn't figure out why he would get the food cells first. I can only say that it is limited to free and just to pass the time.

Since Pirates and Naruto are both your comfort zone, why not write a double-crossing article 🙂 I have never found the ideal Pirates-Naruto double-crossing.

What does this novel say? In the later period, the strength expanded too fast, and it expanded to an unknown height during the time of Hokage. Especially for high-level anime like Jin Gourmet, what is the most important thing? The author's combat performance is not very good, and it's not very enjoyable to watch.

The food cells of the protagonist are no different from him. People eat to gain strength, but the protagonist only does it for enjoyment.

This is the author who really wrote The Light of Konoha. How do you feel that he has been replaced?

I would like to give you a suggestion. The impression of Naruto in this book is not as deep as that of Pirates, Saints, and Bleach. If Naruto is used as the main world, I personally feel that it is not appropriate. Let me talk about my thoughts below My experience of watching Qidian tells me that the relatively dark and deep world background of Naruto is suitable for being extended as a separate world, but it is not suitable for being the main world of the Tenten Style. In contrast, adventure streams such as Pirates, Fairy Tail, and Dioca, which have a somewhat cheerful atmosphere, are naturally suitable for the atmosphere of the Tenten stream. Because the heavens themselves are an adventure, a journey to experience different worlds. If the outline is restricted to the chessboard of "the main world is Naruto", it is inevitable that stories in other worlds will unfold later to advance the plot of Naruto. However, the outline of the Naruto world is limited. In the end, it will defeat several big bosses of the Otsutsuki level or overthrow the ruling class, and finally return to normalcy. However, Zhutenliu is more in line with One Piece's infinite exploration of beauty and the unknown, which is like "people's dreams have no end." Therefore, many good Zhutenliu works do not have an ending for themselves. Because the journey through the heavens is still going on and will continue for a long time to come. To sum up, I advise the author not to limit this book to the framework of "the main world is Naruto", but to combine his own imagination to conceive an infinite adventure across the heavens.

Looking at the introduction, it's a piece of rubbish. When I look at the author's name, I go, Longinus! ! !

The taste of these two chapters is back 🙂 Saiyan eating and training is the right way, and exploring the ingredients of the heavens is the main line. Ninjas can work part-time, but there are so many angel players who have to shout to save the world when they travel.

I first saw your Dark General on a pirated website when I was in middle and high school. It was really amazing at the time. Later I picked up Light of Konoha. Now that I have money, I want to resubscribe for your new book, but I can't stand it. It doesn't have the same flavor as before. I hope to open another Pirates fanfic.

Sure enough, Dark General is your pinnacle work.

The protagonist gives people a feeling of invisibility, and there are too many realistic jokes with other characters. It is strange that it does not look like the protagonist of the novel, nor does it look like the protagonist of the anime. It is a bit nondescript.

The combat power of the Dragon Ball series is okay in the Dragon Ball universe. Everyone has marked the numerical values, so we can intuitively compare the level. But as soon as Dragon Ball is compared with others, it starts to get messy. The combat power system was introduced after Raditz's appearance. What is certain is that Raditz's 1,500 combat power destroyed the city (very easily). What is clearly shown later is the explosive performance of 120 million Frieza. Kamesennin said that it was 150 combat power to blow up the moon or push away the moon, which is a bit outrageous. After all, if we really want to analyze it, there is something wrong with the moon. Whether it is gone or far away, the earth's tide will run wild. Therefore, the performance of Kame Sennin blowing up the moon can only be said to be "animated", close to the performance of Arale. During this period, Beerus had to be controlled by pranks whenever he came. Next, let's analyze Frieza's 120 million combat power benchmark. The diameter of Namek is set to be 10 times that of the Earth, but its gravity environment is similar to that of the Earth. In other words, the mass of Namek is only 100 times that of the Earth, the density is only 1/10 of the Earth, 0.55T/m³, and the overall density is lower than water. The way Frieza in his final form blew up Namek was to use his skills to blow up the star core. Considering that Frieza was not an environmentalist, he did not consider the possibility of protecting the environment of Namek when he fought Super One Goku. Therefore, Frieza with 120 million combat power was a clever way to blow up Namek, which is much less powerful than Earth. So it's believable that Vegeta with 8,000 combat power would make a few more trips to clean landmarks, but destroying the earth is too far away. It was mentioned later that the destruction of the earth was caused by the self-destruction of Lightning Cell, with a combat power of 100 billion. According to what many people say, the performance of 150 and 200 is several times worse. If Frieza with 120 million can use some tricks to explode stars, Cell with 100 billion will be wiped out. But Cell can complete the martial arts tournament... In the end, the combat power system of the Dragon Ball series is very random. The later expansion is the same as that of second-game operators who are eager to make quick money. They purely fill in the values ​​​​with their feet. Values ​​below 1,000 have no reference value. Then when the Ginyu Force arrived, they couldn't control their combat power. Frieza's transformation directly threw the combat power system into a ditch... It can be said that the early combat power added after Raditz came out was probably additive. There was a 33% difference between 150 and 200, which can be said to be a huge difference in performance. After Raditz came out, his combat power was based on multiplication, and many parameters were calculated. The slightly stronger ones had one digit more... The numerical expansion later increased by a thousand times. So it is easy to understand that Dragon Ball's combat power system is confusing. Just like the inflation of language, "fool" and "idiot" have become nicknames, and the combat power system is becoming more and more exaggerated. So I personally feel that the ending of Dragon Ball GT is better than that of Dragon Ball Super. Dragon Ball Super is a bit of a continuation, and it just takes advantage of the IP bonus.

Write about Pirates. The Dark General is so well written.

Personally, I feel that this type of multi-verse story needs to have a main world, otherwise it would not be very interesting if the protagonist is just a passerby in every world. It is also possible that the characters in each world are too tool-like, which makes it a bit boring.

The author has written 6 books, why does he feel more and more childish? Danzo doesn't have that dark feeling, and the character also has a sense of divinity, which looks a bit dramatic and is of a joyful nature. If the author wants to write an infinite stream, he can try to write a self-created type like Samsara Paradise. There is increasingly no market for fan fiction these days. Sea of ​​Death has been badly written by various fan authors. I would like to give you some suggestions. The author wants to develop and break through. This is the only way.

I still go back to read The Dark General and the Light of Konoha from time to time. The only fanfic I have read recently is the third generation one. I don't really like this fast-travel comic book. I haven't read it at all. I believe that I support it if I subscribe to it. Next time I will buy a single-world Naruto or Pirates fanfic, Recast Glory.

When it comes to Dragon Ball's fight against Frieza, it's not good to watch. The plot of Naruto, Pirates, and Bleach is still exciting, and the author has a rhythm that wants to end it.

I quite liked it. It ended too quickly.

For the author's next book, it is best not to write about Zhutian. I feel that it is not very suitable for you. You still have to find the right genre and writing style that suits you. After writing the results, you can slowly look for breakthroughs.

Come on, keep going. I'll catch up with the latest one.

Finish this book soon and start a single-world fanfic.

What does the author want to write in his next book?

I hope the author can choose the right genre and style for his next book.

The most interesting thing about Liuyuecheng is that this chapter talks about two or three things in the construction site diary. Today this female classmate feels like she did back then.