The Third Person's Diary

In my life, I have never truly lived for myself. I longed for love, a sense of security, and even more eager to be loved, but I forgot the most important thing, self-love. I took it for granted that happiness can only be given by others. I never thought about what I really needed. I would just blindly follow the people around me, be easily influenced by them, and completely ignore my own feelings. I have never regarded myself as a person with feelings and thoughts. I am numbly carried forward by life, and I dare not make my own decision, even if I take a small step. I am mentally barren and have nothing I truly love, so I cannot appreciate the beauty of life. I don't love myself or life, I only love the people and life in my fantasy. I can't feel the feeling of stepping on the road. I have never stopped to admire the blue sky for a minute. I have never taken the initiative to smell the fragrance of a flower on the roadside in spring. I don't know what the wind feels like in different seasons on my skin. Rain only makes me irritable. I have never experienced the romance of the sound of rain. Nights only make me scared and tired. I have never had a whim to verify whether the Big Dipper is really the shape of a spoon. I have missed too many real and beautiful details in life. I have been living in my brain and never thought about truly touching the world...