Absurd Autobiography Before the Age of Thirty

How many years are left before you turn thirty? Do you have a stable job? Do you own your own car or house? Do you have a happy marriage? Have you seen the world? Yes, I have none of the above. I don't know whether I should blame my discordant family of origin, my rebellious self, or my solitary and sentimental self. Maybe there are many girls like me who are approaching thirty and still have nothing. So how do you do it? Let me tell you how I did it first!