When I Was in the Nascent Soul Stage, I Was Live Broadcasting on the Earth.

The subject matter is acceptable, but the writing style needs to be improved. The characterization and dialogue are generally not age-appropriate. They are all hundreds of years old. The dialogue seems to be in their early 20s. People become mature and mature with age. This characteristic of Chengfu is not found in any person in the book. It may have something to do with the author's experience. If these can be improved, some small flaws will not hide the flaws. What is the most attractive thing about a book? Subject matter (The novelty and old-fashionedness of the subject matter are related to the desire to click on this book) Writing style (Increase your vocabulary, otherwise you will not know how many words there are, and the whole article will become a running account. Example 1: Zhang San raised his sword and charged at the Sword God, but the Sword God dodged past, and hit Zhang San with a backhand sword! Example 2: Zhang San San's eyes were fixed on the Sword God, as if he was trying to find a flaw, but in the end he couldn't hold it back, so he struck first, mustering up his momentum to attack the Sword God with his sword. The Sword God didn't panic, but Zhang San missed the target even though he took the first shot. Opportunity, this sword is not threatening, he pulls away like a leisurely stroll, and then strikes Zhang San with a sharp backhand sword as if he has divine help. He is going to strike first and come first. Look, he has a lot of vocabulary! I can't find you stupid.) Character writing (It's difficult to grasp group portraits, but the characterization and daily dialogue cannot be like that of an elderly person and a child. A person who is hundreds of years old is still a cultivator, and his mood has been overcome. How can he always show his emotions on his face? Of course I don't mean to have a zombie face, but he can't always look excited, Gao Xingdao, happy way. It is better to write with a smile on the face, a smile on the brow, a smile on the corner of the mouth, a sad face, and a sad face.) Plot (New authors recommend less touch on the main plot, branch plots, daily life, and emotional lines, as it is easy to become toxic, unless the character portrayal is very successful) In fact, that's about it. Generally speaking, I hope the author will work hard!

The subject matter is quite new and interesting. I've given you a monthly pass. Come on

I don't know why, but I don't want to watch it when I see the protagonist reaching a very high level after practicing for decades or hundreds of years ?

It slipped away, really. Don't know what to say

I really don't understand what you are worried about and afraid of if you are not in the same world. How can I come to arrest you even if you know you are a cultivator? Isn't it okay that hundreds of years of cultivation have gone to dogs? In order to please the audience, you attack your fellow disciples.

There are a lot of wrong sentences and typos. The subject matter is good, but it's a pity that it went off topic soon. The various small plots that are intended to impress the readers are also poorly written.

The live broadcast content basically revolves around showing off and slapping people in the face, and then a group of barrage comments such as "big boss is cheating", "I don't believe it" and "what's dripping from upstairs" are not interesting.

The introduction is quite interesting. Let me be this divine farmer.

The biggest flaw of this book is that it is indeed fun to use the system to help others upgrade, but at the same time, the biggest disadvantage is that you upgrade others without upgrading yourself or being the mastermind behind it. You just help others upgrade. No wonder the grades are so poor. Even if you want to describe a group portrait, you still need to upgrade the protagonist. Doing nothing, just like licking a dog, just keep licking others.

I think it would be nice not to have the alien enemy invade at the beginning. Once you see it, you won't have much interest in reading anymore. If it's bad, it'll be bad. What's the point of putting pressure on the protagonist? Isn't this a funny and light-hearted story?

I can only comment like this. The industrial assembly line praises this novel. It is simply a waste product of the industrial assembly line.

I feel that live streaming articles about martial arts and immortality have fallen into the trap of a meme, which makes readers feel extremely cliche. The idea is to believe in science. One book is written in this way, two books are written in this way, and then after several years of writing, the same gag is still used, which is boring.

Why do you explain it when it's so messed up? It's not how it should be when it's messed up. Why do you explain it?

Fellow Taoists, please say important things three times. Please read, please read, please read.

This character is not to my taste, yo-yo

Hehe

I don't quite understand what the main character's live broadcast is for. No matter what you do, you need to have a purpose. If there is no purpose in live broadcasting, you won't see it. You can only watch it and enjoy it.

A novel basically related to the country. All unsightly. Most of the rhythm is something no one can grasp.

The most important thing is that the timeline is wrong

After finishing the latest chapter, I would like to add by the way, it is rare to find a world of cultivation that is not the kind of intrigues and deceitful gangsters cultivating immortals. There is a lot of love between the brothers and sisters. The writing is not bad. Please read it with care.

First!

The most annoying thing is the live broadcast article, it seems like I can't write without live broadcast.

I am participating in the Qidian [Vote for Online Literary God-level Famous Scenes] event. The original text of the famous scene I submitted is as follows. Come and discuss it with me! However, before Su Mu could react, the sound just now sounded again. {"LinkId":"883432641","LinkName":"515 Book Fan Festival-Famous Scene Voting","LinkUrl":"QDReader://ataru. Qidian. Com/noah/883432641?_Viewmode=1&nocenter=2&f=tg"}