A Visitor from Heaven Who Is a Mortal Cultivating Immortality

Come on, the author is optimistic about you. I have been optimistic about many fandoms before. I hope the author can make it to the end.

This is a cool plot, and I like it very much, but it's a pity that the writing is not good!

There are many things wrong with your timeline. First, he arrived at Tainan Xiaohui 3 or 4 months after the Wild Wolf Gang defeated Qixuanmen, not a year at all. Second, he arrived at the Blood Trial about 3 years after joining Yellow Maple Valley. How did he get another 3 years? Third, the demonic invasion occurred when Han Laomo was around 29 years old, which was a little over 10 years after joining Yellow Maple Valley. Your 30 years are too outrageous. In the 30th year, Han Laomo completed the first stage in the chaotic star sea block and moved to the later stage. The timeline is very important. If you get it wrong, many events will not match up. Also, do you suggest that the author should not engage in the Haoran Zhengqi style? I think not many people like Mortal Fans Another question: Does the author intend for the protagonist to be the nanny and matchmaker for the old devil? If you don't interfere, people can develop on their own.

About Haoran Zhengqi. Actually, I didn't plan to write a lot when I first started writing the book, so I could only write whatever came to mind. Later, a group of readers gradually read my book and discussed the plot with me. Plus, they signed the contract due to internal recommendation (although the contract had not been sent out due to personal reasons), and I slowly persisted. So later on, I began to watch other writers' writing while watching Mortals. I also slowly came up with some plots on my own. I have modified them later, but if I still don't like it, there is nothing I can do. After all, I am writing a book, and I don't want to write about cheats. I think real "mortals" are unrealistic, and your time travel proves that you are not a mortal, so "mortals" cannot have poor qualifications. Of course, this is my personal opinion. In addition, I would like to thank all the book friends for their follow-up and encouragement. Thank you all!

You can consider Dong Xuan'er's route. Her mother is the Red Buddha Fairy in the late stage of pill formation, and her father is the Yunlu Old Demon in the late Nascent Soul stage. Then she will participate in the Yanjiabao dungeon, then follow the Hehuan Sect, and then the protagonist will go to the Chaos Star Sea to develop. Ideas are for reference only.

The first chapter is inexplicable. Where did the author or the protagonist get the money? How old was he when he started going to the martial arts school? What is the origin of the character whose body was taken away by the protagonist? Why is he the only child who brings so much money out? Why is there no one to protect such a large amount of money? It is inexplicable.

{"NickName":"Book Friends 160604135511509","UserId":218092042}ロ😐 Junyang, always expand yourself and the world outside you with a positive and optimistic attitude, waiting to enter 😌46.34,753.3, Come on, well written

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