Food Fairy Lord

I have read most of the book in one go in the past two days, and there are still dozens of chapters left to catch up with the latest updates. I like the first volume very much, with plenty of tension, fast pace, and complete design. The protagonist of the volume, Yue Muzhou, is especially amazing. I have read more than 170 chapters in the second volume. To be honest, I am a little disappointed. I have summarized a few points of personal disappointment (basically compared with the first volume): 1. The level of the protagonist's contact is too different. Who are the opponents and teammates in the first volume? Taiyi True Dragon Immortal Lord, Yue Muzhou, Ming Qitian, and Zhu Gaoyang are all above Xuanmen, Tianlou, and Tianlou. In the second volume, they are all in the Shengmai realm, and the mini-boss (or middle boss?) That takes up a lot of space is Shang Huaitong, what the hell is a six-vein stinky fish and a rotten shrimp. I'm not saying that you can't write wonderful stories if you are at a low level, but the gap is so big that readers (or myself) will have a really bad impression. 2. The rhythm is too slow. When I just finished reading the first volume, I thought that the state examination was just a small plot. Soon I would go to Shendu with Ming to participate in the Tang Dynasty martial arts competition, and then participate in the new game in Shendu, which would stir up old grudges over the years and the traces of Lord Long in the world. As a result, I have already seen Chapter 170, and that's it? No, why, the King of Zhenbei and the King of Dragon seem more and more distant as I look at them. If the rhythm is too slow, the tension will be broken. I think the emotional scenes are quite delicate, and the details of the tossing and turning and losing ground are moving. It took many twists and turns to realize what I like, which is fine in itself. It's just that the pace is too slow. . Integrating the emotional drama into the already protracted main plot is dragging on and on. I felt it was dragging on even after watching it, let alone catching up. 3. The plot is scattered. In the first volume, the overt thread is about the arrival of the Dragon King, and the hidden thread is about the old story of Yue Yue, which finally ends with the story of Yue Lao ascending to the sky to kill the Dragon King. It is a very well-designed and complete story. In the second volume, the state examination, Seven Dragon Cuiyu, Happy Death in Tianshan, Zhang family's old stories, and the twists and turns of the emotional drama with Li Mingqing were so scattered that I didn't know what I was looking at. There was no truly amazing line, like Xi Wuqiu/Yue Muzhou. Even the supposed climax of defeating Shang Huaitong was not that enjoyable for me. 4. My original expectations I originally expected the protagonist's realm to improve faster. This does not mean faster in the setting of the book - that doesn't matter, but faster in terms of length and reading time. Because the tone of the first volume is very high, you really can't dwell too much on the low level. I originally hoped that the state examination could be just a small plot. Of course, I know that I should write about the protagonist's growth from scratch in a down-to-earth manner, but can those things about the Seven Dragons Happy Death Tower be skipped, or start from scratch first and then develop it into a god? Why? Because the readers don't care, the readers are more concerned about the King of Zhenbei, the legacy of Yue Lao, the martial arts competition of the Tang Dynasty where the wind and clouds gathered, and the divine capital! I really think that the protagonist should complete the state examination and go to the divine capital within Chapter 100, and his level should be quickly raised to 7/8. Of course, the author wrote everything, and my expectations and disappointments are not necessarily of any use. They are just my feelings while reading the book. I still hope that the author will write better and better.

B， It's been so long since the first volume, so I won't comment on it. Let's talk about the second volume, based on the characters.         ，， However, there are too many "crossing branches" in the middle, which makes the whole volume appear to be scattered and slow. No matter before leaving the county, the first ones to appear are Brother Cheng and Zhang Junxue. I can only tell you my own opinion. These two characters must be successful. Although Brother Cheng is just half a chapter, it serves as an introduction to Qijiao, Huanshenglou, Qi Zhaohua, and Tianshan, and then leads to the grievances in this volume. Then there is Zhang Junxue. Zhang Junxue is very successful in character creation. How can it be considered a success? Personally speaking, at least your character must be consistent, and all changes must be traceable. At the worst, if you say "I don't know what happened to him over the years," I can barely tolerate it. Zhang Junxue's character creation was very successful, especially the scene with the swearing sword, which makes people feel that this is indeed the decision Zhang Junxue should make, including the subsequent quarrel with Xiao Pei, which is very reasonable and has sufficient "motives". But on the other hand, Zhang Junxue's plot is a bit problematic. The reason why Jun Xue participated in the martial arts competition was because of her hatred for Shang Huai Tong, but someone in the chapter commentary said, was Shang Huai Tong's vicious plan at that time necessary? Let's talk about this later with Shang Huaitong. Another question is about the head of the Zhang family. This section should be to pave the way for Xiao Pei's emotions in the final martial arts competition. The Zhang family's actions caused Zhang Junxue's change in mood, causing her to fight to the death in the ring, which further aroused Xiao Pei's emotions during the battle. By the way, Lao Li was also asked to educate Xiao Li, but the problem was that it was too "intricate". Although this paragraph is actually very useful, my own impression of it was not very good when I read it. First, the mood was already in the martial arts competition at the time, and suddenly something happened gave people the feeling that it would drag on for a few more chapters. Second, there was no warning. How should I put it? I was completely unprepared for the Zhang family to show up, let alone the Zhang family to cause trouble. Moreover, there are too many "unexpected" things in this volume. Although the author actually wrote it with a purpose and pushed a little bit of the plot, it does feel that the pace of the whole volume is very slow and scattered. Then, Xiao Li. Xiao Li actually doesn't have much to say. She is a very likable character with a girlish feel. The pressure on Cuiyu at the beginning of the volume when the sun is fading and the sun is setting on her shoulders also has a good impact on her. Whether it was the desperate move to join forces with Tianshan or the weakness revealed later, it was not abrupt. He fell in love with Xiao Pei at first sight after being regarded as a hero to save the beauty, so his motivation was sufficient. The more controversial part is the plot of the uncle. Parrot has explained it, but how can I put it, if you ask me to evaluate it, this part can only be said to be reluctant. It's the same word, abrupt. The master's uncle appears too late. He appears in the chapter before the fight, and it's easy to catch him at a glance. The key is that the parrot has used this trick too many times, and he will get tired of it if he watches it too much. You asked Uncle Master to appear earlier! Ask Xiao Li to introduce his uncle to Xiao Pei! Tell Uncle Master's situation through Xiao Li's mouth! Please let Xiao Li interact with his uncle more! It's not much better than you are now. Now this writing about Master Mage is too tool-like. He appears just to cash in and give Xiao Li a little bit of mental evolution (in fact, it doesn't show where the evolution is later). However, it has to be written in a sensational way, which will offend some people. I remember someone in the chapter review said that to read the novel, you still have to watch the author bully a demented old man. Even if the uncle is allowed to wake up in the end, the perception may be better.         ，，， But Zhang Zongyuan, it's an old problem... Zhang Zongyuan purely upgraded Yang Yan, and by the way introduced Yang Yan's fighting style. Yang Yan upgraded in order to be defeated by Xiao Pei, and finally to foreshadow the emotions during the final. If you say it is useful, it adds a little bit of plot. If you say it is useless, it adds a little bit of plot. Don't always send tool men from the sky!                                                                                                                                                                                                                             <br I don't know if I will write about the division of the lake later. This line is a bit too weak now. It is said that he stabbed Shang Huaitong, but the result does not seem to be important. Firstly, Old Man Sui saw it more clearly than everyone imagined, and secondly, Qijiao had a way to deny it. As a result, everyone seemed to have forgotten about this incident later, and the Wubi audience had no objections to Shang Huaitong at all!                    Ah, speaking of this, has Zheng Dong been forgotten... My evaluation of Shang Huaitong's shaping is that it is better to peel off some things. In the end, Shang Huaitong in the ring was actually very well portrayed, and it should be what Parrot wanted to portray. He was proud of his sword and had enough pride in his sword. Other than that, he was a complete villain. But the problem finally showed up, it was weird.         ，，，，，，， Shang Huaitong said that he was confident enough in swordplay to be as good as anyone else, so why did he limit his opponents to swordsmen? Wouldn't it be suitable to use another weapon? You said it's not impossible for me to understand, but you always feel that something is wrong.         ，，B，，B× It feels like the viciousness is not written out, but it feels a bit like a clown and a villain.         ，， Killing Zheng Dong, it is reasonable to say that Shang Huaitong will be punished, but Zheng Dong himself is too unpleasant, and the situation is obvious, so killing is not considered true. The last thing is about Zhang Junyu Guguang. I always feel that Shang Huaitong's motivation for doing this is insufficient. Speaking of Bai Yuliang, the story of Bai Yuliang was finally brought to Huansilou, which actually weakened Shang Huaitong's description.                                                                                                                                                                                                             but shang huaitong gave me the feeling that he was successful only in the final stage of the ring. "Several" of the “those†shang huaitong in front of him need to be discarded. That's it, I'm tired of writing...

As shown in the picture, all are currently ordered and have been read (first stack up) Talk about personal feelings and some conjectures. The biggest feature of this book for me so far is the meticulous and realistic writing style. If Wang Wei's poems can be said to contain paintings and poems, then the author's descriptions can make people immersed in the scene and unable to put it down. The first volume is exciting, fast-paced, with ups and downs of the plot, and the foreshadowing in the text is echoed. The second volume, currently at a slightly slower pace, tells the story of a young man's love affair and the protagonist's love, hatred and initial growth in the big vat of Jianghu. Some shortcomings may be that the characters who have just been portrayed will be sent to the knife in the next moment; and as mentioned in the summary of the first volume (free chapter, non-spoilers), they are going to die, and some characters will ignite the protagonist's emotions or advance the plot. As for the fast-paced life and death in the first volume, everyone is actually guessing when they will die most of the time. The only confirmed thing is that the protagonist will not die, which gives people the feeling that all other characters are actually nourishment for the protagonist. Tasting the so-called knife is like swallowing a frozen sugar-water sword, which stabs all the internal organs. The six organs seemed to be clenched tightly, but besides the stinging pain, there was a hint of sweetness from the warmth of flesh and blood. The more you tasted it, the more profound it became, and then more and faster deaths, according to the author, increased tolerance. This also caused the death of the characters later to lose some of their expressions. It was like chicken ribs, eating them had no meat, and discarding them had flavor, which only made people feel numb. For example: If this is the way to die, eh! I knew it was so. If I didn't die, I guess how I will die next time. If it was another way to die, oh, it would be reasonable and unexpected. And the current martial arts level of the protagonist is also very strange. In terms of martial arts, I practiced two basic swordsmanship, and then went to cross realms to learn difficult swordsmanship. (This is patched later. Yue Lao plans to take care of the children in his own Tianlou.) In terms of realm, if there is no other, Yue Lao will leave it alone, just eat it. At present, he does not cultivate the realm at all, and only relies on taking Long Lord's relics and tonics. Later, I started to lay the foundation, three days of fishing and two days of drying the net. When I encountered something difficult to learn, I just practiced until I had the inspiration, and then suddenly, eh! I just can! I don't need to be literate, I don't need a complete foundation, my talent is here! It's enough to have inspiration! It's so weird, and even when he knew about his situation, he didn't try to make up for it. He had to be supervised every step of the way. He was taught by the top sect first-hand, and he was perfunctory after leaving. In the last few days of Kan Li, he remembered that he had to deal with Ming's mother. What's even funnier is that the illiterate protagonist has become a stereotype, and it is easy to explain. A highly talented countryman from a small place, of course, has many shortcomings. After eight years of learning swordsmanship, he was more casual and unrestrained based on his talents. During this period, there were many signs of getting older. However, this old man has died. Before his death, he also confessed that he wanted to have a good life and education. Ming's mother also emphasized that he did not care. In the final analysis, he was just a child who would not grow up. There must be people who work harder than him, and there is one in front of him who is more talented than him, but currently the only weapon to defeat the enemy is in his hand. As mentioned in the introduction, the sword he pulled out towards the Dragon Lord, everyone was preparing for his sword. It has a kind of solipsism. For a talented player who is illiterate and has no knowledge of theory, how many more deaths will it take for the protagonist to have a sense of urgency without the promotion of the plot? How many more times will he have to be tortured before he realizes this? I'm looking forward to it. Speculative summary: The fast pace of the first volume and the rapid advancement of the current state. When it is determined that the world is not invincible and the enemy is coming from the sky, a lot of pen and ink should be used to intersperse branch lines in the main line, such as teenage love affairs, old stories, and cooperation. The author's writing style has written every side story well, otherwise it would be too fast to finish the book. The main plot is to grow up, fight monsters, upgrade and deal with alien enemies, or add the world outside to supplement the world view and fight against the invincible alien gods. I hope there will be an eye-catching twist. Next are some guesses about the plot Regarding the illiterate protagonist, the patron Xiuwenkan recommended by Yue Lao will probably "properly" teach the protagonist how to read and write, or the author will use it to the end for the illiterate protagonist. Has he learned it? Like learning! Regarding the love affairs of the protagonist, the talent of the female supporting role will definitely not keep up. It is emphasized that talent does not determine everything, but the protagonist relies on talent until now. Later, he may make up for the talent by supplementing the setting, or become a breakthrough when fighting someone, sacrificing his own Cuiyu, and his name will be known throughout the fifty states, or he may have died long ago. When the protagonist finally fights against someone, his name will be resounding throughout the Tang Dynasty. After all, if a gun like "Cuiyu Sword Gate will always be there" exists, it will one day go off. Write something weird about the plot and speculation Dragon and tiger shadows now have new enemies, and the bones of the hero are forgotten. The sound of swords is heard on the rivers and lakes, and Cuiyu cries into the love between children. The wind and clouds see the courage of heroes, and the sacred city hears the sound of bones. The duel between humans and gods reveals the true self, and the Snow Goose sword points at the Immortal Dragon Lord. Finally, everyone is welcome to discuss it together. I have been reading at night for a long time, but I finally don't know what to say. I hope everyone can be tolerant.

There is a lot of beauty in the structure, such as "The young woman in the boudoir knows no worries, and goes up to the green building with makeup in spring. Suddenly she sees the color of willows on the street, and she regrets teaching her husband to find a prince." This kind of beauty is glimpsed in a moment, and another example is "The horse returns from admiring the flowers, and the horse flies away. The wine is weak. It is already dusk when the alcohol is sober, and it is dusk when you wake up to enjoy the flowers. The beauty of "Return" is of course interesting, and it is difficult to distinguish between different preferences, but its objective writing skills can indeed be said. As of Chapter 242 of the Fish and Dragon Dance, I personally think that Parrot's writing skills are indeed good in Volume 3, and the structure of the work is more delicate. Before I officially start my personal opinions, for the purpose of overlapping, I would like to emphasize again that literature, as one of the arts, is the dialectical unity of sensibility and rationality. Therefore, we should look at it with a critical attitude and examine it carefully. There is no such thing as a precise answer of yes or no. Everyone has a certain understanding of it. The evaluations are based on my own reading experience and environment - that is to say, what I talk about is a very personal point of view, and it may not necessarily agree with your thoughts. This happens to be the sensibility of art, and because Parrot's beautiful words are here, there are so many ideas generated by collision. When a character is created to face the audience, if he does not need to bear much responsibility - he has few roles, then it is very good to get a glimpse of the whole process in a moment - for example, Lin Jue outlines a very brilliant character arc with very concise words. And for a character who needs to bear major responsibilities - many roles, that is, the protagonist, how can he skillfully lift the veil - his character, story, and then build up an image in the mind of the reader? It is very important for the author to think, because turning an unknown into a known thing, turning a mystery into a commonplace, is a process of disenchantment (I strongly agree with what Parrot said in the interlude, daily life consumes a character's charm, because the establishment of the character's image is very serious, and daily life will solidify the character's behavioral logic. When this behavioral logic has to be destroyed in the development of the plot, the more solidified the character, the more violent conflicts will occur) So how should we introduce the character of Li Xizhou? In fact, Li Xizhou has already appeared in the first volume, spanning two volumes. When the third volume officially appears, it naturally has to be consistent with the previous article to have a new beginning. Therefore, Li Xizhou tells the ins and outs of Xia Gu Can and Yue Muzhou. Unfinished business, but in this rigorous logic, Parrot deliberately set up a sense of disobedience, "It is Jing Ke who is single-minded, Mo Jiaozhao sees the word Chunfang", "The dead man in Wuyang, Encore and success", "I want King Yongbei of Yan to die", " No matter what crime you have committed... I will rescue you." "I will personally hold a box for you with a picture." "The immortal hunter said that you like to read and write lyrics, but you don't know how to read, so I will give you a seat in the Imperial Academy... I will take you there, and we will talk in detail." They are both profound words involving personal paths, and caring like a friend. Even if they know each other in the letter and read your deeds along the way, can the two people really do this when they meet for the first time? Pei Ye does not trust, "If two people have never met or understood each other, how can they trust each other?" Therefore, Parrot gradually unfolds the plot according to this sense of dissonance, and as the plot unfolds, Parrot embeds the structure of the plot layer by layer very skillfully. So when I looked back at Volume 3, I had to sigh, in fact, all the developments have been foreshadowed.       As mentioned above in the first meeting, Li Xizhou seemed to trust Pei Ye very much, but Pei Ye didn't seem to think so, so in Chapter 22 of Volume 3, the second meeting, he wrote about Pei Ye's life-and-death friends, so that Xixi knew Pei Ye's distrust. When Pei Ye asked her about her support when Xi was assassinated, Xixi said that she would talk about it when life and death depended on her - look at this, I believe that her friends who have been chasing her until now have understood her support. The only thing she relied on was the sword of Pei Ye, and she also encountered an assassination again. What she relied on, and the fact that she would encounter a real assassination, was the verdict of two things. When looking back at this, the rigorous closed loop of time and logic is so interesting - Xixi is indeed full of trust in Pei Ye from the beginning of her appearance. This trust is the only ray of light after searching everything - this is just a framework. If you want to write well, There are a lot of things that need to be filled in, and they need to be filled in delicately, so the plot starts from the assassination of the deserter and gradually explores the shadows behind it, which is accompanied by many interesting branches, and these finally converge to the Huanlou. I personally think that the Huanlou section is a key node in Volume 3. In the chapter of Fantasy House, we can see Parrot's exquisite conception - based on the above description, I think Parrot is an author who is very good at burying trigger points in the front and then triggering recovery one by one in the following. In Volume 3, he came up with an interesting idea. This kind of trigger point is made into a large and small loop structure, and strict plot logic is used to promote the trigger point, forming a very interesting reading experience, which has the beauty of succession and transition, and when looking back, the closed loop of back and forth will add a bit of flowing interest. In a loop-like structure, all characters will appear in one place, and as the narrative develops, these trigger points will gradually trigger, and finally converge to one place again - Huanlou is this place. I think the sword and bracelet that Parrot plays against the little sword fairy in the Huanlou plot are the embodiment of this structure. When Parrot thought about the writing of this structure, he thought of using it in the description of martial arts scenes.       Before the chapter of Huanlou, if King Yan is to be killed, the shadow of Shenjing must be removed. The investigation begins with the assassination of Huangren, but is interrupted by Yu Ziliang's intervention. However, it can be seen that "his father" is covered by this shadow. However, through Huangren, the human pen is still found, and then the black glove Qiu Tianyu is found. It was Yu Ziliang's "father" Yu Sicheng who intervened. This time, the clue must not be interrupted, so in Chapter 58, Li Xizhou and Pei Ye did something firmly for the first time in a real sense. Then the clue pointed to Huanlou, and they learned that the shadow was Li Du. Li Du received the destiny "Li's humerus, stretching for hundreds of years." "Year", if Pei Ye wants to kill Li Du, then he has to go through the destiny of heaven, so there are two days to refute one day's argument, so there is life and destiny to fight against Haotian, so there is a person to fight against Haotian's representative Li Zhi, and Li Zhi is the person who inherited the sixteen characters of "Li's humerus", then who will fight against Li Zhi, as long as he wins If you get rid of him, you can get past Li Du, and you can get rid of this shadow, which is to make plans internally and then externally plot against King Yan. Until then, we also know that, yes, the only thing she relies on is the sword Pei Ye. As I said before, these two things are made up of a large loop structure. When will life and death depend on each other? Someone wants to kill Xixi, and the only one Xixi relies on is Pei Ye. This is another bracelet, and there are many small bracelets in this bracelet. Before, Yue Muzhou was sitting in front of the temple to protect Wei Qingju, and now Pei Ye is sitting in front of the temple to protect Li Xizhou. They are also nested in other bracelets. Zhang Mengqiu failed to protect Li Du and failed to kill Li Xizhou. As of the current chapter, which is Chapter 242 of Volume 3, Li Xizhou's image has been revealed quite completely, and a big plot is almost coming to an end. Book lovers who are interested in reading suggest that it is time to start, and those who have been following the book may wish to re-read Volume 3, I believe they will have more new experiences.

This way of writing, this writing power, this structure, is this a newbie? I'm afraid the reincarnated boss didn't come from somewhere...

Who remembers the little flute player in those days, when the sky was cloudy and his clothes were wet? Riding a bull calls me across the stream. Seeing fish quarrel with each other and pointing fingers, lifting a load is like a rainbow. Ten years ago, this is a dream, and I am confused when I read the letter again. Xiaoshui always has no timetable after autumn. The wind makes my sleeves cold, and the rain makes my bones miserable. When I wrote about the poetry meeting, I was a little worried about the bad atmosphere of poetry - because I really write poetry... The negative teaching material is Gu Zhenren. Every time I see a happy moment, the real person will recite a limerick, subtly ruining my reading experience. In the whole book, there is probably only one line, "The power of the five realms and nine heavens, all in one breath" that is considered good. The rest (including other parts of this poem) say that the modern style has no rhythm and the ancient style has no rut (both in ancient and modern times). Today, my heart always falls into my stomach. Look at the word score first. I put it into the machine word spectrum and tested it, and found that there were two or three errors. It doesn't matter if it's a slight flaw (or maybe I didn't choose the right method). At least it does rhyme (it can rhyme both in ancient times and today). Let's go back to the word itself. This is a very simple little poem. It is about recalling the past and learning about people and the world. We know that it is the story of Brother Hecheng. Return to reality and express emotions. The most common mistake for poetry students today is lack of logic. The reasoning of the original case is fair. The clues that the detective knows that the reader does not know are not considered the original case. The same is true for writing old poems. The human affairs and physical objects that appear later must have foreshadowing in the previous article; a poem is a whole, and the preceding and following contexts will color each other, so the images must be related. Literary theory talks about a tacit understanding between readers and authors. Poetry readers assume that what you say is meaningful and clear, and you must be worthy of this trust. If you really don't want to waste your brain, there is a shortcut: just tell the truth in every word, stay honest, don't add allusions to make the words look better, and don't add or subtract a single bit through artistic processing. Then your poem will definitely be clear and clear - but it may not be meaningful. Life is boring after all. The parrot did a good job in writing the poem Qi Jushi. Start writing "Who Remembers the Little Flutist in the Past", using sound to introduce characters and scenery. This is a very classic technique that can be used for transitions and starting strokes. For example, if you write about the exterior scene first, how do you introduce the protagonist of the indoor poem? You can write about the sound of birds singing outside the window. If you write about the noise of singing and dancing indoors, how do you write about the sky? You can write about the sound of music and the silence of the clouds. "The sky is just wet and the clothes are wet", (the ancient rhyme of "shi" is a character with entering tone, oblique tone) The scenery comes out at this time, and the sounds and colors are all ready at the same time. "Riding a bull calls me to cross the stream. I see fish quarreling with laughter, and lifting a load is like a rainbow." The narrative is natural and innocent. What is bull riding? There is a "piccolo player". Lu You's poem: Riding a bull and playing the flute to accompany the village children. Why do you laugh when you see a fish? You see a fish by "crossing a stream". What is hauni? "The sky is cloudy and the clothes are wet", and the rain has passed. You see, the above structures are interconnected, and everything happens for its own sake, so it's very logical. The next step is to change the head, "Ten years have passed and now there is a dream", which is another classic transition technique. When do you usually realize that a dream is a dream? When waking up from a dream (a round of powerful music sounds...), The word "dream" is basically a universal solution for breaking away from memories, and is often used as a clear boundary between memories and reality in a poem. "The words are blurred after reading the letter again." The aftertaste of the dream (and it can be seen that the two of you are not semi-literate like Xiao Pei). "The Xiaoshui River after the autumn is always destined to last forever." I feel sad when I touch the scene. What scene? Water view. There is no date, the jade promise has no date, the water is there, the promise is there, where are the people who made the jade promise? Ha, they have already gone to heaven. "The wind brings coldness to the sleeves, and the rain makes the bones feel desolate." Coldness comes after autumn, and the rain comes again. Are the people who were shoulder to shoulder at that time still alive today? A sigh. This adds to the first rhyme of "Tian Yin Qia Cha Wet Clothes". A little suggestion: The thinking power of this poem is better than mine, but the syntax needs more consideration. First, although words cannot help but be emphasized, after all, this is a small order, and there is no conscious emphasis on the emphasis on words. Too many words are not good. The second one is "It's raining to the point of desolation", which has poor syntax and seems to be a forced parallelism. The parrot has really done what I want to do. You are also allowed to write a knight who is as good as ascending to the sky immediately. You are also allowed to write a novel and then compose poems based on the fictitious events. You😠don't force me to beg you😡 It's better to write more to me😋 Don't force me to kneel down and beg you😭

That means don't pursue reading! (The parrot probably wants to hack me to death when he sees it) The book "The Immortal Eater" is strong in its structure and writing style. This is a rare feature in online books, and it is more like a physical publication. However, Parrot updates a small number of words every day, which leads to a huge amount of foreshadowing. If readers follow many books at the same time, or if they are used to reading books at a glance, they will ignore the details of the parrot. I am a very careful reader, and I also like to catch up on a part and then go back and read it again. So I often feel happy and excited when the foreshadowing of the parrot in the previous chapter echoes the following chapters. (Usually a few sentences or a paragraph. If you read it back, you will find that the answer has actually been told to you before.) Parrot writes characters carefully, and the way he creates characters is not tacky. Characters are not simply distinguished by good or bad. Qu Zhu is the soul character throughout the second volume. The corresponding person is Yue Lao from the first volume. The person Qu Zhu is gray. He feels like Lao Bai in "Breaking Bad" to me. The initial reason for Lao Bai's crime was that he wanted to get a sum of money for his family because he was terminally ill. Then he got deeper and deeper, hurting more and more people. In the end, he harmed others and himself, and died. Before he died, Lao Bai confessed the truth, that's what he wanted to do. "Chemical achievement" is his poison. What he cares about most in his life is chemistry, and he wants to prove himself. For the sake of family and so on are all superficial excuses. He left the last bit of kindness in human nature to Xiaofen, a young man who was both friends and disciples, but also hurt each other. The same goes for Qu Zhu. He said that in order to get rid of the centuries-old curse for his sect, he entered the game alone to destroy the Huanshu Tower and control the heart of the West Courtyard. But during this process, he went further and further. There are so many people hurt by him, and behind every soul-stealing bead are living people, young people who have learned swordsmanship, and injured families/sects. 1,000 Sword skills equals 1,000 people. To say he is a serial murderer/terrorist is an understatement. He is purely selfish, and the poison in his heart is the sword. Not being talented enough is his eternal pain. He wants to prove himself, and he wants to climb the mountain of kendo in his own way. In order to achieve his goal, he invented the Soul Seizing Pearl, and he and Huanshenglou used each other at all costs. The only kindness he left was for Pei Ye and Meng Li. He had the chance, but he didn't have the heart to kill them directly. Some people say that Qu Zhu is an undercover agent. This is pure nonsense. Qu Zhu is just a pitiful and respectable failed careerist. Fortunately, he will not regret it, he did everything he should do. In the end, he was sent on the road by the young man he was optimistic about. Isn't it a happy ending? The more people discuss/dispute Qu Zhu, the more it proves that this character is well written. This is a compliment to the parrot. I hope Parrot can continue to maintain its advantages and continue writing. Don't suck. If the word count is doubled, you can become a god. It's a pity that roommates, exams, classes, and various reasons have dragged you down. (Why don't we suspend school!!! (Dog Head

Before abandoning the book, I thought about it and wrote a book review to give future book friends some mental preparation. Contains spoilers, read with caution! Advantages: The author's writing style is excellent, and he often depicts a full-fledged character in just a few strokes, and the logic of the story is relatively strict; Disadvantages: The plot is extremely depressing. The small boss that the protagonist tried his best to defeat in more than 20 chapters can only be regarded as an elite monster later on, and the protagonist is almost invisible throughout the whole process. The early stage was like a martial arts novel, and the later boss felt like it could destroy the world... The author only regarded the supporting characters as tool men (this is what the author said in the summary at the end of the first chapter), and the supporting characters who spent a lot of time and ink died in a reasonable way within one or two chapters. When I read later, I couldn't even bring emotions to the characters, so that when the protagonist's master died in the end, there was no fluctuation in my heart. As the protagonist, you will become more and more frustrated, watching your companions die, but you are completely powerless - encountering an enemy that is completely unable to compete → the supporting character dies → the protagonist struggles to survive → the reinforcements arrive late → the reinforcements meet a stronger enemy → the reinforcements are crushed to death → the protagonist struggles to survive → the stronger reinforcements arrive late → the stronger reinforcements meet a stronger enemy → the reinforcements are crushed to death by the enemy... So how did such a strong enemy lose in the end? The answer is that the protagonist's grandfather used his mechanical deity to defeat the boss with great power. As expected, the grandfather also died. It's very cliche, right? However, the author also explained Grandpa's deus ex machina very clearly. There was actually someone behind all of this who was controlling the whole incident. The story has a strict logic, the readers are frustrated, and the supporting characters died in vain. As a reader, after reading the first chapter, I still feel depressed. So many of the protagonist's companions were tortured and killed, and this damn immortal king caused so many murders. His end was - the trace of consciousness that he invested was gone... Friends who can accept that the plot is overwhelming can watch it.

I have now read Chapter 2, Chapter 142. So far, the advantages and disadvantages of this book are very obvious. First of all, the advantages. The author's description of the growth of teenagers is quite good. He is good at describing emotions delicately and in detail. There should not be many people dissatisfied with the emotional description of this book. The character creation is also very full and the writing is very good. The author has worked hard 🙂. The shortcoming is that it is written in detail. This is an online novel after all. If it is written in too much detail, it may not be all good. Your supporting characters are written in as much detail as the protagonist. This can be said to be more or less indistinguishable. The protagonist in a novel is the core. You can't write supporting characters the same way you write the protagonist. There are signs of this from the first volume. Why does the first volume feel like a knife? There are too many descriptions of these supporting characters who are about to die. Spending most of the chapter writing a supporting character and then hanging up the supporting character would of course feel a bit censorious, but this is within an acceptable range and can even be regarded as a feature of this book. But in the second volume, it is a bit too much. The main plot of the second volume is obviously the protagonist participating in the competition, and then various branch plots are connected in the middle. Not to mention that the martial arts competition begins after writing one hundred and thirty chapters. Although the protagonists participate in these branch plots, it seems that the protagonists of these branch plots are not Pei Ye, but Yang Yan, Li Yiqing, and Zhang Junxue in recent chapters. Did you say that the protagonist of this line is involved? If you are involved, does the protagonist take the lead in the branch plot? No! There are only half of the cool moments in the second chapter that I can remember. The first one is when the protagonist kills Qisheng alone, and the other half of the protagonist Kenshin is pretending to be cool. Why half? Because then I asked Shang Huaitong to pretend to be cool and wiped out the excitement for me. He didn't even say that chapter 50 was a small climax, chapter 30 was a small climax, and chapter 140 was only half as exciting. The excessive description of details is also mentioned in the fight. In the second chapter, the author is very obsessed with the game of weak against strong, Li Piaoqing fights Qijiao, Pei Ye fights Qisheng, and now Zhang Junxue fights Shang Huaitong. Moreover, he not only writes the protagonist's game ideas, but also writes the opponent's game ideas. Write down his thoughts and feelings after each move. There are only two moves with one sword, and I wrote twelve paragraphs. A very important point in reading a novel is the reader's imagination, but you inserted so many game ideas between the two moves, and the feelings of both parties. I can't imagine any sense of picture in my mind. When I don't have a sense of picture in my mind, no matter how good the writing is, I only know after reading one chapter, oh, these two people had a fight, was it exciting? It seems pretty exciting, so what do I remember? I remember they had a fight 🤔. . . Especially when two supporting characters are fighting, I can't remember it, so naturally I feel that the pace is too slow. All in all, I can probably understand that the author wants to portray the characters in a more three-dimensional way, so that each supporting character has flesh and blood, but again, this is an online novel after all, and it is still an online novel that is being serialized. The rhythm of the novel is the top priority. With appropriate trade-offs, the protagonist is the protagonist and the supporting role is the supporting role.

After reading it in one sitting, I still have more to say. The pen carves into the wood three-thirds, and the chivalry fills the heart. I don't want to find out whether it is the physical style or the online writing style. From joy to surprise to annoyance to relief to aftertaste, I haven't had this feeling of drifting along with the text for a long time. This alone is worthy of my high praise for this book. Although good writing is valuable, to be honest, it is not top-notch in my reading. It has a touch of literary youth and warmth, which is very comfortable. However, under the literary and gentle writing style, there is a heavier, complicated and anxious content that is inconsistent with the writing style. If you read it quickly according to the way people read online articles today, I think many people will always feel depressed and have a sense of disobedience, as if they are being played. But coincidentally, or unluckily, I was busy traveling with nothing to do today, and suddenly I wanted to read a book slowly, even if it was an e-book. I greatly diluted these feelings of inconsistency by carefully studying each word, and chose to feel it casually along with the article, and this made me deeply feel what really touched me - chivalry. No matter how gentle and gentle the writing style is, as I read slowly, the martial arts world that the author wants to show through delicate writing truly gave me a "movie-like" reading experience in which the most powerful warriors are strong, fighting and fighting, as if the snow is flying for a moment [the sky covers the eyes and makes me speechless], the coldness seals the throat, the heart of the sword is bright, the sword of the sky kills the immortal king, only to save Feiye, and seven steps to get older The story of Eighteen Years of Head Decaying and Entering the Sky Tower was as if I was immersed in it. The two-line narrative, the dark line narrating the story of purging the Wu family, and the exciting point that finally coincided with the overt line of Yue Lao and broke out did not make me feel like I fell into a cliche. After thinking about it, I felt that it was only the chivalrous character of the author that infected me, and I was instantly attracted to the radio waves. There is less and less chivalry in today's books, whether in physical books or online. Some books seem to be chivalrous at first glance, but they cannot stand up to the careful scrutiny of the plot, and they are just piled up. From the author's words, I can feel the author's love for martial arts and his unique imagination and creativity. This new vitality and chivalry have deeply affected me. In short, this is a good book and a good introduction to the world of martial arts. Although it is an online article, it needs to be read carefully. I hope the author can write the martial arts in your heart without being affected by commercialism. I think you have the ability, and I also believe that it will be very exciting and creative, so write boldly, not for anything else but for martial arts.

Taking advantage of Parrot's recent leave, I reread the previous chapters. I feel that there are indeed some problems with the rhythm of the second volume, not only due to serial reading, but also a certain imbalance in the book itself, especially the martial arts part. Now I finally believe that Parrot is a real newcomer, at least he has never mastered a long article like this. His delicacy and meticulousness remain the same, and a large part of the cruelty in the first volume also comes from the "reflection" style rendering of each deceased person. But maybe because every character is carefully polished, Parrot seems a little reluctant to make subtractions - to be honest, basically no one cares about how Shen Yao, Zhang Mozhu, Zhang Zongyuan and the others fight. In fact, the battle between Zhang Zongyuan and Yang Yan was very well written, but when I read it I felt a little irritated - I was holding my breath waiting to see Xiao Pei severely humiliate Shang Huaitong. Because there are all kinds of imbalances like this, unless Zhang Junxue can be written to the level of Gu Guang, the plot that is obviously above the standard will lose a lot of flavor. Then again, in fact, the density of descriptions of these people is actually no higher than that of Lin Lin, Shen Yanping, Cheng Feng, and Cheng Jianghong. However, these people are exquisitely portrayed and quickly put away their swords. In the middle period, they are not too dead. As a result, unimportant characters will appear repeatedly. Every two or three chapters, a lot of pen and ink will be divided. When accumulated, it will naturally become procrastinating. It's a bit like card games like Slay the Spire. The advantage of consuming cards is that they leave the deck after performing their functions, which will not affect the operation of the deck. The fatigue in the middle of the second volume of this game is the result of having to knock every "hand card" - a hand full of high-quality cards, but the deck is too big to cycle.

I have been reading it for two days. I couldn't stop reading it at three or four o'clock every night, so I only read two volumes. As a book that focuses on martial arts, the narrative and writing are really smooth and exciting. The first volume is in-depth, with high-level fights, how high the sky is; the second volume is about counties, cities, and state capitals, how wide the sea is. Armed with sharp weapons but immature at heart, it is inevitable to be confused. But there are always people who stick to the muddy water, and together with the youthful spirit, they cut out a piece of sky from the darkness. But the best thing is that the story doesn't end here. The young man has cut off other people's lives, but he has not given himself an explanation: life and death, constant separation of life and death, but he has to go to the golden stage to get a piece of comfort... To please the living, who will comfort the dead? So the last sword was a matter of course. Every time I watch Late Night, sometimes I get very annoyed by the pointers in the chapter reviews, but when I calm down and think about it, I find that there are some great insights in them, and they are not all made up of nothing. But some of them are still very embarrassing to watch - if you don't like it, you don't like it. If you have an idea, you have an idea. Do you have to add "show off", "childish", "poor writing" and so on at the end? Do you have to force people with different opinions to come in and criticize you? It's like writing a review, I don't know what my mentality is, alas. I think it's pretty good, but it's a pity that I came two years late to see this book. But I've saved a few million words to read it, so it's not bad 😏

Why do I feel that the emotional scenes in this book are very well written, even if it refers to the relationship between men and women alone, it is wonderful. I think a very important reason is that both parties are complete and vivid people. This is a test of the author's skill, but it is obvious that the author is very familiar with it, especially in the portrayal of female characters. The failure of many emotional scenes in Qidian male comics is that the female characters are stereotyped and simplified, without rich character characteristics. Of course, this is one of the foundations for the mass production of many kinds of horse stories, and it is also one of the reasons why it is increasingly difficult for me to accept harem stories. In fact, this is also a kind of respect and equality, but many male video authors do lack respect, equality, and the most basic sense of empathy for themselves and others. The women they write are more of a projection of obscenity in their minds, and it is difficult to convince people that this is a complete and independent character with the unique charm of the character. Only between real people can long-lasting and deep feelings burst out, not only in writing books, but also in actual interactions. Only when both parties are based on a common affirmation of the completeness and complexity of the other person can a kind of friendship between gentlemen be established, which is as light as water but can share the same aspirations.

The problem is too big, the enemy is like a genius with an IQ of 200 points who has calculated thousands of levels, and the protagonist is like a stupid pig. Every time something happens, it always seems to be unraveling, but in the end the opponent succeeds. He will never be swayed, and will always go to the dark side on the road of being calculated, and then rely on his teammates to sacrifice himself to gain victory. It's like a kindergarten fighting the armed forces. It's hard to tolerate the villains if they don't win. The decent ones are still alive because they are too kind. This is a complete plot design problem.

This book is of the same type as Xuezhong and Chixin, which belongs to the late stage of literary youth disease and is hopeless. The advantage is that authors in the late stages of literary youth disease usually have very strong storytelling abilities, their writing skills are above the standard (otherwise they would not dare to be literary youth), their characters are well created, and the pictures can at least give a good experience. The shortcomings are also outstanding, the combat power is relatively idealistic, the main story line advances very slowly, and there is a lot of nonsense. Oh, I have to add one more thing to the online article. The fan group cannot listen to any criticism. I don't know if this is a group.

​ 1. Consideration of Kongtong's consequences: At the expense of the death of the sect leader Bai Tianqu and the suicide of the sect leader Xiao Dai, Kongtong created a situation in which Kongtong cooperated with Huansilou just to create a sword technique that combined 24 swordsmanship for the gate, and did not know that he wanted to kill the Liuli Sword Master and obtain the sword Tao. Point of confusion: Suppose Ming Qitian is successfully killed and Ji Changyun is not exposed. So what does Yunlang Mountain think about it: one of the Immortal Quan swords is lost, and the Young Sword Master dies. The consequences are likely to be that Huanshenglou is completely victorious, abandoning the car to protect the commander and lurking underground, Yunlang Mountain moves into Shaolong, Kongtong is dismembered and bears the taint of collaborating with Huanshenglou. Then Kongtong lost its prestigious archway, not to mention all kinds of cooperation such as quotas for Daoqihui. After that, it lost the source of high-quality disciples, and it was a vicious cycle. We can only wait for this matter to disappear for a few hundred years and everyone forgets about the stain, and then a genius disciple learns this swordsmanship and enters the upper heaven. Only then can Kongtong be revived and go further (it is very likely that it will be annexed by other forces, and Kongtong is no longer there). Contradiction: Did Kongtong pay too much? Several people died in the Huansilou, and what they got was the sword Tao immortal power. Kongtong acquired the swordsmanship, died as the sect leader, and became the sect leader with two Ye Que, the custodian of the book collection (maybe also Ye Que?), And most importantly, he became the enemy of Yunlang Mountain, the leader of the sword sect in the world. Everyone would only make trouble for Kongtong in order to please Yunlang Mountain. 2. Immortal Terrace, Tianshan is doubtful: After Shadow Face Sima appeared and killed Han Shi, everyone clearly realized that Grandmaster Yeque appeared in Huansi Tower. At this time, Wu Hejian was still leading the investigation. Shaolong Immortal Terrace at least had to come to Grandmaster Yeque to help, right? The most important situation is that Master Zhang Xianren personally leads the team to investigate the case. Maybe it was still in the investigation stage at that time, but later on, even the Xiao family leader was exposed, and there was still no investigation. In fact, the host of the chapter only followed Mr. Sui at the end, which is impossible to explain here. The same goes for Tianshan. After Sifeng died, Tianshan should send Ye Que to check what happened. It is impossible to ignore the death of a Sifeng. In fact, the backend seems to have disappeared, without this power. 3. Sui Zaihua's achievements are questionable: What did Sui Zaihua do in the entire Huansilou case? 1: Kill Sun Liu in Jinyuzhai and Wuhejian. Two: Assist Pei Ye to rescue the owner of the Glazed Sword at the end of the Kongtong battle, and destroy Sima's treasure raft on the other side with one sword in the final battle. Who seriously injured Sima, and who killed Yi Duanzhi? Pei Ye! (After he obtained the power of the Immortal Lord from Pei Ye to kill Sima and Ye Que, after he showed this power, he could only be placed under the supervision of Tianlou. He was already a younger brother on the roster.) So why did Sui Zaihua get promoted? He really didn't do anything in the whole case. Too deliberate. 4. West Ting's heart was suspicious: During the last battle, everyone discussed whether west Ting's heart was in Sima's hands. After Sima escaped, everyone knew that west Ting's heart was in Sui Zaihua's hands. Confusion: Why does the Mirror Dragon have no effect later? Did this thing that Qu Zhu worked so hard to create come to an end so easily? Why did Xitingxin give up to Qu after the game? Even if this thing from the Southwest Authority is not activated by Daliang Immortal Quan, it should still be passed on to the Opera Lord after things are not harmonious. Later, when Sima summoned Xijun, he said that Xitingxin was given to Qu Shi, which made me unbelievable. How could it be possible to give him such authority as Xitingxin? Should Huansilou give Qu this kind of power that requires the use of immortal power? The above are all my personal opinions and there is no reference for authenticity.

As the title shows, although I am not an old bookworm, I have read a lot of novels in 23 years, almost in all genres. The Immortal Eater may not be the best one to me, but it is indeed the one that surprised me the most. I feel it is necessary to write a long review to praise this novel, because I think this book is worth it, and in the current Internet environment, I think it is even more difficult to praise it than to criticize it. There are enough negative comments in the comment area and posts, and I want to give some positive comments to encourage the author. First of all, let me be honest. The following contents are all personal feelings and there is no objective evaluation at all. If you think there is a problem, you are right. I will not refute it. Some spoilers warning, I hope everyone has at least finished the first volume before reading this review! First of all, the plot. The first volume of The Immortal Eater gave me a big surprise. The tension and pressure from the beginning, coupled with the author's solid writing style, easily made me immersed in it. The plot design of the desire to advance and the suppression of the main plot, and the design of the dark line in the main line, all made the ending of the first volume unexpected and reasonable. I think the first volume alone can be viewed as an excellent independent plot. I personally like the kind of explosion after being extremely depressed, which is very contagious. After reading the first volume, I knew that I must read this book to the end. The second volume is not over yet, but it is obviously much more stable than the first volume, giving people the feeling of a buffer period after a high point on a roller coaster. In fact, overall, the second volume is more like the beginning of a traditional martial arts novel. A young boy who gets an adventure is just starting out, and meets his little friends and the pretentious clown villain. However, compared with the first volume, the tone seems a bit low. But I think that the beginning of the second volume is the beginning of Xiao Pei's real growth path, because in the first volume, Xiao Pei has no way to intervene in most things and can only passively accept it. The first volume is more about setting up characters and providing adventure, and starting from the second volume, Xiao Pei begins to embark on a journey, gaining limited knowledge and undergoing his own transformation. If the first volume is "immortal", starting from the second volume is "mundane". By the way, many people think that the author does not have an outline, but the plot behind the second volume has a lot of corresponding foreshadowing in the previous volume. I even discovered it only after the second playthrough. If you say that there is no outline for such foreshadowing, I don't believe it. Then, I want to talk about the character design. I think the character design can better reflect the power of Parrot's writing than the plot, because everyone thinks that the first volume is particularly knife-like. In fact, if the character is not well created, it will be difficult to feel even if the knife is used. This also proves the success of character creation, not to mention, the characters in the first volume are bento. , Except for one and a half exceptions, not much ink is actually spent on it. One is naturally older. In fact, I think the older the character is, the most successful character created in the first volume. You may not like this old man who likes to "seek death", but when he faces that choice, you will feel that he will not hesitate to "seek death". Therefore, Yue Lao's death is considered to be full of flags. Even if it is to advance the plot, he will not survive. The other half is a childhood sweetheart. Why do you say half? Because all the descriptions are profile descriptions after her death. To be honest, I think the repeated mention of this childhood sweetheart is to pave the way for Xiao Pei to recognize his feelings recently (it sounds like a tool). In addition to character creation, the character interaction parrot is also very well written, especially the sense of distance in the interaction between Xiao Pei and Xiao Li. From far to near, from just knowing each other to flirting, the transition is very natural. There is also the interaction between Xiao Pei and Mao Maolong, which adds a lot of levity to the tense first volume. I really like how Parrot handles the distance between dialogues between different characters. Simply put, the drama is great. Of course the parrot's martial arts drama is also very good, but I really don't care about it very much, and I don't understand it very well. I can only say that it is written very carefully. Finally, I would like to guess some of the subsequent plots and the fate of some characters without overestimating my ability. If I get slapped in the face, I will treat it as amusement for everyone. In fact, Xiao Pei has nothing to guess. He is going to Shenjing immediately. He doesn't know the specific situation of Shenjing. I just know that he will definitely cause trouble. Then there is Xiao Li. Many people think that Xiao Li is not talented enough and should be just a passing character. There will not be many subsequent plots and there is a high probability that he will be hidden. But I don't think so, because I think Xiao Pei is Xiao Li's adventure. After the sect affairs are handled well, Xiao Li will follow Xiao Pei to Shenjing. There may be twists and turns in the middle, but this short ending will not change. I don't think the few people who were rafting together on the lake were convenient. They were more like the protagonist group. Through various turns, the climax chapter in Shenjing should also come to the center of the whirlpool of the incident. Doesn't it sound cliché, but I think the plot of The Immortal Eater is not won by novelty, but by detail. The meticulous portrayal of the world, the polishing of foreshadowing details, and the delicate description of the heart are the fundamental reasons why The Lord of Food impressed me. ps: I had originally wanted to write a long review on New Year's Day, but I was forced to forget it by my friends, so I didn't think of it until New Year's Day. I was afraid that the longer I put it off, the less I wanted to write, so I simply forced myself to finish writing before going to sleep. I started writing in the middle of the night. I may have written confusingly and did not express my meaning. Please forgive me. If you remember anything that you forgot to write later, please write it in the comment area.

1. In the early stage of "The Immortal Eater", a solid martial arts/immortal worldview was established: morality, responsibility, cause and effect, and growth. · The motivations of the characters are rooted in the logic of Jianghu (such as the trust of life and death). What readers are looking forward to is the struggle and sublimation of the characters within the framework of chivalry. 2. Emotional invasion of light novels The "Shura Field", "Confession Bureau" and "Dual Heroine Confrontation" introduced in the third volume are essentially light novel-style emotional consumption: Emphasis on "labeled" characters (first love, princess, sun); Pursuing the drama of "famous scenes" (saying goodbye under the moonlight, squeezing through the door and smiling); Use poetic language to package emotional dilemmas ("Tame the Heart and Trust the King"). 3. Conflict points ·In traditional chivalry, emotion should be part of chivalry (such as Guo Jing's "never lie to her" to Huang Rong); Under the logic of light novels, emotion is an independent consumer product, and character consistency can even be sacrificed for "sweetness" or "sadness". ·Pei Ye's "everyone likes" confession is "frank" in light novels, but "not strong in moral integrity" in chivalrous narratives. --- 2. Why do you think it is "complex"? Because the author briefly returned to the chivalrous logic in Li Mingqing's farewell play: "We meet again in the mountains and rivers, and we will meet again later" is the freedom and ease of the Jianghu people; "No need to worry and get entangled" is in line with the chivalrous open-mindedness. But the beauty of this story is tainted by the manipulation of light novels in the context: In the former, there is the embarrassing plot of "taking your ex-girlfriend to find your current girlfriend"; In the latter, there is the ambiguity of Pei Ye's character (jumping between "innocent" and "scumbag"). As a result, this farewell seemed like a forced "highlight moment" rather than the natural growth result of the character. --- 3. Traps that authors may fall into 1. The struggle to please two kinds of readers Traditional fairy tale readers should be "chivalrous", while light novel readers should be "emotional." The author tried to stitch it together, but it resulted in a split in the story's temperament: investigating the case became child's play, fighting solved everything, and the emotional drama became like playing house. 2. Use "writing style" to cover up "character collapse" Li Mingqing's farewell speech is indeed beautifully written ("male and female can live a hundred years" is very charming), but writing style cannot replace character logic. If she is really so transparent, why is there a Shura field before? If Pei Ye really respects her, why put her in the position of being "chosen"? Using poetic language to wrap up emotional holes is a common tactic used by many authors to avoid digging deeper into their characters. 3. The power is given to the readers, not the characters A good author should let the characters make their own choices (such as the tragedy of Qiao Feng accidentally killing A'Zhu with a palm); And the third volume of "The Master of Immortals" seems to give the right of choice to "market preference": Want a Shura field? Arrange! Want to confess affectionately? Arrange! Want to let go? Also arranged! As a result, Pei Ye became an emotional tool rather than a knight with a unified soul. 4. Where does your "sense of complexity" come from? Because you feel at the same time: 1. The shining point of the author's writing (such as the artistic conception of the farewell scene); 2. The collapse of the narrative logic (the character design is inconsistent); 3. The regret for the fate of the character (Li Mingqing could have been more three-dimensional, but became a pawn to promote the plot). Five Possible Suggestions 1. Admit its imperfection: treat it as a trial and error in the author's growth, and do not insist on perfection. 2. Focus on the parts you like: the chivalry and writing power of individual scenes in the first two volumes can be enjoyed independently. 3. Be wary of "sugar-coated bullets": beautiful sentences may not carry true emotions. Learn to distinguish between "rhetoric" and "character arc". ps: I am Xiao Li, and I think Xiao Li's final farewell part is really good, "Goodbye, Young Master Pei Ye" and "[Tame the heart and entrust Junsu, the male and female will live a hundred years]" are too painful. I obviously can't let go but I want to reassure my sweetheart. The restrained and blooming relationship before was very good, but in the third volume, the relationship with Da Li lost this flavor. A person thinks about the failings: I feel that the relationship with Da Li is a failure, and there are three failings 1. The relationship with the second heroine, if not handled properly, will become an overly strong plot anchor, locking the reader's attention firmly on the entanglement of "relationship between men and women". This will instantly reduce the previous main lines of grievances, martial arts pursuits, and character growth to the background of emotional dramas. You will find that the subsequent plot is likely to start to revolve around "responsibility", "guilt" and "Shura field", and this is exactly what book friends complain about as "light novelization" - replacing worldview conflicts with emotional conflicts. 2. Dimensionality reduction of character charm: from "independent she" to "his woman" Especially in chivalrous/fairy novels, excellent female characters are often charming because of their own brilliance and independence. Once a physical relationship occurs with the male protagonist, if the author's writing skills are insufficient, it is easy for the female character's behavioral logic to begin to revolve around the male protagonist, and her personal charm and independent goals (such as the princess's responsibility for the family and country, the chivalrous woman's self-pursuit) will be forced to give way to "her in the relationship." This is the underlying reason why you feel "character destruction" - the character has changed from "a complete person with his own world" to "a functional symbol in an emotional drama". 3. The preset "contract" in your heart has been unilaterally modified As a reader, you have established an invisible "contract" with the author in the early stage: you are looking forward to a work with a traditional chivalrous spirit and restrained and condensed character relationships. The author suddenly introduces a straightforward physical relationship, especially in a slightly "conventional" way (such as the involuntary relationship after life and death), which is equivalent to unilaterally modifying the "contract". You will feel a "sense of betrayal" because the story is no longer the one you were emotionally invested in in the first place. The "flavor" has changed because the "soul" of the story has changed. Two Summary 1. What AI refines may be a little inconsistent, but it's almost the same meaning. 2. I hope the author knows what he wants to write. If it is popular, it is quite popular to write it now. If it is original intention, it may be difficult. It will be very uncomfortable if it is not up or down. Just like Pei Ye, if the pulse level is not up or down, it can be done but it will not affect anything. Xuanmen can be useful and cannot do it for a while. 3. Pei Ye can only choose one friend in a skirt, but it's a pity that I was born in a skirt at the wrong time. 4. Three-fifths of the plot is good to watch, and the rest shows structural problems. 5. Purely subjective comments.

Can more people die? Can more insignificant people die? Those seniors, Emperor Tang, and masters of Optimus Prime from various sects in the world will die cleanly for me! This world is so boring, isn't it because there are tall people to support it? When Pei entered Beijing, he really seemed to have become an actor. Threads of emotions, social relationships, and the so-called martial arts ladder completely wrapped this person's edge in an established comfort circle. Even if he had the so-called spirit, it was just a show-off. There are more and more friends, and life is getting better and better, but the death of the senior in the past and the fate of Taiyi Longjun have not been truly reflected for a long time, rather than recited verbally. To put it simply, the contradiction is not sharp enough and the contrast is not clear enough. Xia uses martial arts to break the law. In a peaceful world, this kind of people are obviously unstable factors. They do not care about property and go their own way. They can easily be exploited and cause social panic. Only in troubled times can people who are rejected by mainstream values ​​stand out. Only then can we shout the slogan of serving the country and the people and helping the troubled times. So I think that the more exciting you want to highlight the hero, the more you want him to break the established rules. Whether this established rule is good or bad is not primary. Chaos is a good place for him to live and show himself. Just learn from your first volume, where nothing has unfolded and everything is chaotic. Now that I see your world, I'm afraid it's not similar to the Taiping world. Don't be cruel, there are too many good people, and there are too many people who are easy to talk to. No, for those sect leaders, do they really rely on their martial arts skills to reach that position? The more you write like this, the more it becomes like a fairy tale world playing house. Don't go to the countryside to rely on fish and meat, ordinary people? Those who practice swordsmanship are really like the energy input from outside by you, the author, in order to maintain the stability of this system. The most important thing is that there is no sense of mystery in this world anymore. Once you enter Beijing, you will stand at the top and see things clearly. The recent competition is also very funny. The whole world has become a huge campus, and this is a final exam. But even the school is full of talented people, but I think the people here are becoming more and more flat. All of them came to participate in the martial arts competition in a well-behaved manner. The so-called army generals also came to fight. Wouldn't you laugh when you made up his moves? Just put a label on them. Finally, I will give you two suggestions. First, the above people should die more. I think more people can die. Not only is it insignificant, people close to you can also die. Princes and medicine bacteria can all die. Is it concrete to inherit their legacy and not hate them all at once? And it has to be force majeure. For example, someone on Taiyi Longjun controls it. It cannot die too cheaply. It would be better if Pei Ye died, and it would be more interesting. It's interesting to think about it. I think it's time for people to try something new, what do you think? Second, learn more about the real situation of real society, the political economy, the laws of social operation, and how the occurrence of some black swan events causes the collapse of the system. Instead of just reading some history books or something, you have to look at it in light of reality. Every inspiration you are looking for can be found, and every character can be vividly portrayed, divided by class, country, occupation, gender... There are too many. The so-called gods, except for some people who are really mentally ill, are mostly people who have formed their own complete world view and firmly believe in it for a reason. Isn't it interesting if you can grasp such a person thoroughly and portray it in a book? Isn't this a hero everywhere? I think most of the comments can be ignored, including mine. The way you went your own way in the first volume was still very cool. The more I run some kind of group and look at other people's opinions, the more I feel constrained, my energy is gone, and I can't write anymore. It's Pei who's being restrained, so why aren't you being restrained? You may fall in love with the book, or the characters in it. But I think you have to be cruel, detached and cautious. A little bit crazy, a little bit epileptic, but that's not a characteristic. Your writing foundation is already very good. I think what you need to strengthen is how to write interesting books, rather than blindly catering to the general public. This is just the words of a reader who becomes less and less interested in reading.

First of all, I have to admit that I preconceived the idea that Pei Ye's relationship with Da Li was a failure. It was quite the opposite. After reviewing the original text, we must admit that the previous criticism of the relationship between Pei Ye and Li Xizhou was biased. Far from being a failure, this arrangement is a highlight of the author's characterization that he rarely manages to maintain amidst the chaotic narrative rhythm of the third volume. Its success lies in the fact that the author goes beyond the clichéd description of desire and conducts a serious discussion about responsibility, honesty and the nature of emotion. Pei Ye's words, "I can't just rely on you to value me and not care about me... Just to enjoy this sweetness" and his attitude of clearly distinguishing "the responsibility of life and death" from the "responsibility of love", made his image not collapse, but deepened. This shows a young man's sobriety and restraint in the face of desire, and his sense of morality is in line with the previous character of Zhongnuo. In particular, he is frank about his feelings for Li Mingqing and his responsibility to Li Xizhou without being ambiguous, which sublimates Pei Shaoxia's usual charisma. And Li Xizhou's "try" is not frivolous, but an effort based on the extreme trust in Pei Ye's personality to try to bring the relationship back to authenticity and freedom. On top of this, it also has the meaning of moving when the love is full, and it is also a girl's sincere invitation to her partner that she "can't wait to become one". The relationship between the two is based on extreme honesty. This kind of sincere questioning of the sincerity shows the author's potential and sincerity in dealing with adult emotions. However, this microscopic bright spot just illuminates the huge shadow of the macro narrative of the third volume. The "low standard" of the work does not lie in the deepening of the relationship between the characters, but in the disorganization and imbalance of the overall plot structure: the villain's strategy is childish, the plot of Yu Si's accomplices is anticlimactic, the rhythm brought by the new map is slightly out of control, and the transitional characters in the daily "Pei Ye Friendship Club" are slightly templated. The collapse of these "hardware" seriously distracts the reader's attention, causing the character growth drama that should be focused on to be submerged in the noisy plot flow account. The author seems to be driving two carriages at the same time: one is moving steadily forward on the subtle path of the character's inner world, and the other is running out of control on the grand road of expanding the worldview. Therefore, an accurate evaluation of the third volume should be: the author has maintained a high level of exploration of the emotional core of the characters, and even made breakthroughs in complexity; however, there have been obvious mistakes in the execution of the complex plot structure, resulting in partial brilliance that cannot conceal the weakness of the overall perception. This contradictory state reveals the author's strengths as a narrator (good at describing people) and shortcomings (lack of framing things). The ultimate regret is that the emotional chapter that could have been the finishing touch is greatly reduced in power because it is placed within a shaky narrative framework. I hope that in subsequent creations, the author can regain the precise control of the story rhythm in the early stage, so that the light of the characters can truly shine in a more stable world. I also hope that my friend in Qingskirt can look at each other and smile with Pei Shaoxia and say goodbye, "Goodbye, Pei Ye Shaoxia" and "Goodbye, Piao Qing Shaoxia" again. It is rare to become each other's sun for a period of time.

The characters are really touching, and the rhythm of the plot may not be in line with the current mainstream of online literature, but such careful carving is not superfluous. It really makes the characters extremely full, and it is inevitable to have ups and downs of emotions when watching it. In addition, the kitten is not the author himself. I laugh to death. Every time the kitten complains, it feels like the author is interacting with his own characters. It is really great. Enter with confidence, it is a rare good book. Don't dislike the author's seemingly overly detailed description of the character's heart. This is the case for a growth-type protagonist, so that in the later stages, the writing will become smoother and more successful. 🦜Come on, this style is too precious, please keep writing.

I like Qing Qing the most and respect Miss Ming more than anyone else. Talking to Xixi is the happiest thing. But if I had to choose who to die with, I would definitely choose you, Kitten.

How many more chapters do you need to add to this plot? When will the Feather Scale Trial be written? I've finished it for you these days and don't plan to pay off the debt?

I thought about it, but I still couldn't bear to come back. What are you going to write? I wrote a lot, and in the end I felt like it was stuck in my throat or chest and I couldn't get it out. I didn't understand it, and ended up confused.

​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ Out of praise for the excellence of this book. Let me briefly talk about the divergence of the setting, which is about the immortal power of the "Xitingxin" and some foreshadowing that may be related to the goals of the Tianshan Sect. At present, some of Tianshan's "Eight Horses" and "Seven Jade" have appeared, and the setting of "Seven Jade" as the maid of the master of the West Courtyard has also been revealed. This leads to a question, why are "Eight Horses" and "Seven Jade"? The setting of "Eight Horses" is taken from the legend of "Eight Horses" written by King Mu of Zhou and the Queen Mother of the West. King Mu of Zhou rode on "eight horses including Chi Ji (Nie Shangheng, Bai Yi (Shang Yuning) and others) to patrol the west." The allusion of "Eight Horses" is not unfamiliar in classical mythology. But "Qiyu" is very interesting, because the name "Qiyu" has no counterpart in classical mythology, but judging from the names in the book, it refers to the maids around the Queen Mother of the West, Wang "Zideng", Dong "Shuangcheng", Shi "Gongzi", Xu "Feiqiong", Ruan "Linghua", Fan "Chengjun", Duan "Anxiang", and An "Faying". I checked and found that these names come from the "Internal Biography of Emperor Wu of the Han Dynasty". It is said that Emperor Wu of the Han Dynasty met with the Queen Mother of the West, and the Queen Mother of the West asked her maids to play music and songs for him. Then the question comes. If you count, there are eight maids. In other words, the corresponding "Eight Horses" should be "Eight Jade" instead of "Seven Jade". Which one is missing? I didn't read the book carefully, so I don't know if the last name "Faying" appears in the book, but I tend to think that "Qiyu" is the first maid in "The Biography of Emperor Wu of the Han Dynasty", "Zi Deng". Because I looked for "Internal Biography of Emperor Wu of the Han Dynasty" and read it. Among them, "Zi Deng" is the maid of the Queen Mother of the West who appeared to summon Emperor Wu of the Han Dynasty. The remaining seven maids, Shuangcheng Gongzi Fei Qiong Anxiang and others were only mentioned. Only Zi Deng played an important role in the story, and she was also the first among the maids of the Queen Mother of the West. In the original text, it is mentioned that Zideng "wears green clothes", "often delivers missions" and "comes with Beizhu Immortal". However, in another ancient book "Xu Tanzhu" that records the myth of Emperor Wu of the Han Dynasty meeting the Queen Mother of the West, the signs of the Queen Mother of the West's arrival are stated as "Suddenly there is "The blue bird comes from the west", that is to say, although the name of the maid of the Queen Mother of the West does not appear in "Xu Tan Zhu", the "blue bird" actually corresponds to the fairy "Zi Deng" who wears a blue skirt and is accompanied by the North Candle Immortal. Combining these keywords, the direction is very obvious. This leads to another problem in the novel, which is that the treatment standards given to Yu Fei by Tianshan are too high. Li Eiqing can carry Tianshan's seal and write invitations, and Yu Fei can go to Tianshan's candidate disciples, but at what cost? ... No! Tianshan does not interfere with Yu Fei at all, and does not borrow money from Shaolong, and this is the strategic goal of the first part of Tianshan. Even considering Tianshan's strategy of plotting against Xitingxin, this resource tilt is a bit excessive, at least far beyond what a "Xitingxin carrier's first love" should do, because the current information Tianshan cannot even reach an agreement on Pei Ye's personal disposal. So based on these, I tend to think that just as there are five people in the Four Heavenly Kings, the "Seven Jade" should also have the eighth jade, or the first jade. And this "Jade Head" is likely to play the role of a leader like the "Prince Deng" in the mythical story during the return of the West Court Lord. This will also become the key to the competition between the Li family, Tianshan, and the protagonist's power in the West Court. In such a plot, there is probably no one more suitable to be the key "key" than Li Mingqing.

Came here from Himalayan Listening Book. I listen to and read books, and I am not very selective. I have dabbled in all three types: no heroine, single heroine, and multiple heroines. These three types are distinct and each has its own audience. It is best to choose a path and follow it to the end. Jumping left and right and swinging repeatedly are absolutely forbidden. If you take the pure love route with a single heroine, then from the beginning, write only one love line. Since this book has already written three love lines, and the audience is mostly the harem party, then let's stick to the harem route honestly. If we change the route at this time and jump to pure love, it is purely looking for scolding and seeking death. Two more points: 1. Internet articles are not reality. The background of this book is the Tang Dynasty. If you are a pure lover of the party, don't use monogamy as a moral baggage. 2. There is no conflict between the chivalrous character and the sentimental character. A great chivalrous person serves the country and the people, and his core is righteousness and justice. There is no conflict with sentimentality/harem. On the contrary, it conflicts with the beginning of chaos and the end of abandonment.

My talent and knowledge are shallow, so I only leave the word "good-looking" as a souvenir 🙂

I feel that the restriction of Xuan Qi in this capital has great side effects. Without the restriction, it would take ten Xuan San to kill one person. With the restriction, maybe ten or twenty eight lives would be enough. The cost of training ten Xuan Sans is much higher than that of ten Ba Sheng. Just say that Xuan Sans are very rare. Ten Xuan Sans can easily find the force behind them. Ten Ba Sheng's attempts to find the mastermind behind the scenes are like looking for a needle in a haystack. Is this encouraging assassination in disguise?

I heard from the book friends of Mengqun 🦜 Yu Lin has prepared abbreviations for the test to see if everyone supports it

Pursuing reading is very important for newcomers and new books. I hope you will try not to keep books, but follow the updates every day and take care of the seedlings. Thank you! 🥺