The Legend of the Talented Immortal

It's not fair, it's not fair, I'm not considerate, please reply if you receive it!

The writing is good, come on 666, mutual acceptance

Happy Mid-Autumn Festival, happiness and health

Collected, well written, keep up the good work

Come on, Shuzi will give a brief review of this book. Please ignore any inappropriateness. Because Shuzi listens to books, the lines and white characters of the book are not very clear. However, it feels good to listen to it. There shouldn't be any big problems. The title of the book is also quite attractive, and the introduction is okay. Let's talk about the writing style. Personally, I feel that the early stage is more funny and more linear, so I don't count. Stunning, but still very smooth and natural, I give it to you as a lollipop~ But there is a small problem in it, that is, when describing the main point of view of the heroine (Hou Lingwei), it is a relaxed and advanced science fiction film. In the later period, it gradually became a serious drama and a traditional fairy tale. This change in the writing style may be a little bit abrupt O_o (personal thoughts) The writing in the later stage is good , much more gorgeous, very good to watch. You can think about this question again. Is it necessary to change it? The author also mentioned the switching of the protagonist. In short, it was "broken", which made people feel that the whole article was too casual. Originally, the cut from the heroine to Lu Feng was at best, but in the part about the role of Letcher, there was a bit of indifference (dog head) This is what I think. Of course, it makes sense if you think there is nothing wrong with it. The priority depends on the length of the article and the overall situation. It is also a bit strange and harmful that Hou Lingwei and other protagonists and teammates have no scenes. In short, these small problems are ignored. The whole article still has many advantages. The author has a big imagination and unconstrained imagination, which is quite excellent!!! I hope you can encourage the rats together, come on, come on, come on!!!

Already collected, come and comment! "Five Stars Shine".

The subject matter is pretty good, but I haven't seen time travel. It's updated every six days, so it's quite unique to sit down! In terms of writing style, wouldn't it be better to add a more personal description? Technology is booming. Should it be cashed out on a larger level? What is a car and that ball for? The effect is not enough and seems a bit abrupt. Of course this is just a personal feeling and does not represent the author's level at all! Hey-hey!

Keep an eye on you, don't goo goo goo goo goo, come on, I think you will write well