Traveler

If you don't write it anymore, please finish it. This will more or less allow me to gain some starting coins.

Brother, are you sure you are here to write online articles? I'll talk about the flaws I see. The first one is writing style. To be honest, if you are writing a novel for the first time and the language you can write is pretty good, you may have seen some lame novels that look like elementary school students' compositions and laughed at them, but your writing skills are not much better. One of the most serious problems is that it is seriously out of touch with the rhythm of online writing! Description is necessary, but it cannot overwhelm the subject! If you look at the length of your paragraph, it is either psychological description or background description, and there are all kinds of mess, resulting in low information density. No one likes to read this. What readers want is simplicity and directness. For online articles, I emphasize again that the writing style of online articles has only one requirement: smoothness! Let the readers read it smoothly and effortlessly, instead of following the character's psychology here and there. Simplicity, conciseness, and smoothness are the most important things in web writing. Second, segmentation. Judging from the size of the mobile phone screen, writing five or six lines is already considered intensive. As a result, your paragraph directly covers most of the mobile phone screen. This density is enough to dissuade readers. They will feel dizzy at the first glance and are not interested in scrolling down. Third, plot. I don't know if you have heard of the rule of three golden chapters. The first three chapters directly create conflicts and get to the point, instead of talking about nonsense such as settings, backgrounds, and relationships between characters. These things are slowly thrown out later. At the beginning, there are a lot of characters who are related to each other and the readers can't figure it out. Only by creating conflicts directly can you attract readers to read on. Your first three chapters are really convincing. With the cumbersome writing, the segmentation of passwords, jumping scenes and several characters, after reading it, you don't know what you wrote? Don't expect readers to read line by line. People who read online articles read them line by line. If they don't see anything attractive after a quick glance, they will naturally throw it away. In short, your writing is the basis for telling good stories, so go read the books on the list and simply write another story, which might be much better.