There's Something in My Head

The novel is quite interesting, but the author occasionally forgets the punctuation when writing... When did Yu Sheng and Shigure get together, and it always felt like there was something strange between them? ? ? Why does Shigure always want to undermine Yu Sheng? I was confused about the setting of that memory world. (Of course, it's possible that I didn't understand it) As for Shigure's identity, Yu Sheng's father was rescued by his comrades when he was young. As his daughter, she should be relatively young, so Shigure has known Yu Sheng since she was very young. In this case, normally speaking, Yu Sheng should have told her more or less about someone who had a good relationship with him. (Even if you haven't seen it, you should have heard of it!) Finally, I hope that my emotional intelligence can be higher for the rest of my life, but I always feel like I will get beaten if I continue like this. (Note: What I said may not sound nice. I hope the author will not hit me⊙▽⊙. If you want to delete it, just delete it. Come on, author! (ง •̀_•́)ง)

It looks good, please give it a thumbs up to the author🤭🤭

Put double quotation marks around what the character said, so that it is easier to distinguish whether it is what the character said or the character's inner activities. Otherwise, author, if you continue writing like you are now, it is unlikely that you will have readers. Of course, as long as you write for a period of time, you will be able to discover this problem yourself. I guess you will not apply for the manuscript after you finish writing. Also, I think there should be a sense of picture, but you have not expressed it, so it is difficult for readers to have a sense of involvement. For example, you can roughly describe or write one or two items or other things to supplement this sense of picture. My little suggestion, I am also a new author, please forgive me if there are any mistakes. (Note: The author can delete my post after reading it, the author is free to do so, it doesn't matter to me 🙂)

It's interesting to read the introduction, and the ideas are great! Come on <(｀^´)>

It's entertainment, not bad, keep it