Protocol Anchor

Hello author, I have read Chapter 73, page 3, and I really can't stand the feeling of separation I think the author's creativity is actually quite good, so here are some suggestions from my own reader's perspective After reading Chapter 72, I feel that the biggest problem with this book is that There is no foreshadowing, the characters are unclear, and the logic is fragmented Let's talk about it in detail below Foreshadowing In the anchor world, the protagonist escapes and leaves on the bus. I saw that the author described the protagonist's smiling face on the glass window. This paragraph is very touching and well written In addition, it also focuses on describing the details of this anchor worldThe foreshadowing is done, but the problem is that the foreshadowing is in the wrong place (I think) shouldn't the foreshadowing be at the beginning The foreshadowing in the book now is like this (only the beginning is used as an example) ---The protagonist travels to other worlds ---After three days of observation (the number of words here is too few) It feels like there is no foreshadowing at all) ---Then he is immediately held hostage in the elevator ---The protagonist is passively dragged into the anchor point ---The protagonist gains abilities from the anchor point and escapes (here are some details about the world of the anchor point) ---The details of the anchor world are foreshadowed ---Then travel to the next world Look The actions that really pave the way for the details of the anchor world are in the penultimate line Suggestions In the next world, slow down your writing speed and try to pave the way for the details of the world Character The protagonist Li Cake made me realize that the unknown character was when Li Cake was held hostage and forced to participate in a (robbery?) Li Cake sets up the device ----- This whole paragraph makes me not feel what Li Cake's initial personality is like However, in the following, Li Cake shows wisdom and various knowledge in the laboratory And the self-supremacy consciousness (can't think of a more appropriate word) shown in the first world after entering the anchor point And all the things that follow after that, Li Biao's thinking changes in the second world after the anchor point The characters represented by the above three representatives are all different. The key is There is no transition in the change of character So it gave me a sense of separation, as if the protagonist of the previous and later stories were not the same person I wanted to convince myself that this was the feature of the book and the general environment the author wanted to construct. But I knew very little about the world in the book and could not develop empathy at all Logical separation This is somewhat related to the character. Let me give a key example In the post-world of Li Cake's second anchor point I found the home of the body I was attached to, obviously hiding a secret, and then left directly My feeling after reading this paragraph is ---This is the decision made by the author in the arrangement, not Li Cake making this decision ---Because of the separation of characters, I suddenly can't understand why Li Cake did this There will be many logical separations like this in the future, because mobile editing is inconvenient, so I won't list them Personal logic suggestions I think It should be good to supplement the characters, because it is the lack of transition that causes the separation I suggest that it be supplemented in the future world (otherwise it will look very fragmented) Memory mode supplementary characters like Naruto and One Piece Or the interrogation performance of the weather forecast Finally, I reiterate that the above is only my personal opinion This book is indeed very creative and I hope it can be better Welcome to discuss

It feels like there's something wrong with the protagonist's thinking. The protagonist in the superpower world discovers that there is a basement in his home, and there may be unknown risks. He takes some money and runs away... MDZZ This is your home! No matter where you go, you can't talk about it. 😅 God's superpower is more important, so just run out and find a hotel. You have no memory at all, and no understanding of the customs and habits of this world. You just run around with a little money... The more you think about it, the more retarded you become. Compared with wandering around outside, the home where you may have been living is obviously safer and it is better to obtain information about the world.

Come on, let's collect each other's crazy lives for the rest of our lives.

It gives me a headache. There is no clear idea that guides the entire text. It looks like a diary. The protagonist's behavior feels very robotic.

The writing is good, but I still have to say, what the hell is it?

I read it in a daze, and you wrote it in a daze.

This rhythm is okay, but I can't explain clearly what was lost in my mind, and I don't have much understanding of the protagonist's abilities.