I Own a Junkyard

Other people have all kinds of powerful connections. Mine is a junkyard! Others compete over their fathers and mothers; I rely on a junkyard! Others succeed through hard work; I succeed through a junkyard! With a junkyard, I can get my hands on treasures from the Three Kingdoms era and become Hua Tuo's disciple from afar, learning the Qing Nang Classic. With a junkyard, I can study the original Taijiquan Classic by Zhang Sanfeng. With a junkyard, I can get my hands on an Iron Man suit. With a junkyard, I can even get the Queen Mother of the West's peaches of immortality... As for enemies in the real world? With a junkyard, I can swing my arm in a wide arc and slap my way through them all...