Metal Sequence

Forty chapters have passed, and the protagonist has not yet integrated into this world, and there is no sense of immersion at all. The character of the protagonist is not complete at first glance, and he does not know what he is doing all day long. He is completely confused and lost. He looks like a child at one moment and looks like a robot at another. Some characters in the story have the mind-reading and mind-bending abilities. They don't know what they are thinking all day long, and they want to describe what they are doing. Jing Hua Hu is not an anti-dog. Most of the forty chapters are filled with negligible names and various details that can be skipped. I thought it had been two or three months since the protagonist traveled back in time. The protagonist and the group of poor friends are still strangers. If there is no interaction, the protagonist is left alone. The stupid person who calls the protagonist's wife Hurry up and write him to death or make a big change. He has a foreign body with the same power as Ran Tang, but he opens his mouth and shuts up. Wife, giggle Don't dig holes in the branch of the water branch. Start the plot quickly. The battle is also fascinating. You have to rely on your brain. The male protagonist's predecessor is so powerful in this future world. You, a factory worker, are going to mess with him. The enemy is fighting, hurry up and get the memory of your predecessor back, and try your best to limit the male protagonist's life like a turtle grandson. Who can watch? You should write less about conspiracies and conspiracies. Everyone is here to see cyberpunk, not to see palace fighting. I have always wondered why so many Western fantasies engage in this stuff. There are so many inner dramas. What have you experienced in reality?

I feel that the author still has great ideas, but in terms of the creation of the protagonist, it is not very successful. A person in his 30s behaves like a teenager, especially when he has just traveled through time. He has no vigilance at all, and the protagonist is too weak. It is best to unfold the setting when the excitement is rising, so Only in this way can the audience have the motivation to continue watching, and a clear main line must be set to give readers hope that the protagonist can make a comeback, so as to reflect the growth of the protagonist. From the chapters I have read, the plot setting is not very good and there is no orderly arrangement, so that it looks like a sadistic story. Since it is cyberpunk, the power should not be too strong, otherwise it will deviate from the set events to be shown, but it should not be too weak, because few people who read novels are willing to read sadistic stories.

The foreshadowing is a bit long. I can't understand it when I look at it.

Why don't you update it? Is something wrong? 😟😟😟