My Path to Becoming a Strong Man

Brother author, first of all, there is a problem with your layout. It makes readers uncomfortable just looking at it. If there are no readers, there is no one to blame. Second, the first chapter is too long, unnecessary, and uncomfortable to watch. Moreover, in the first few pages, readers feel uncomfortable with the layout issue and have little interest in reading further. Third, the idiom "precarious" is more often used for buildings or mountains. If it is used on a person, it can be said that the person is tall and mighty, like a mountain. However, I see that you applied this idiom to the mortals in the story. In a story, using idioms appropriately can make the story more exciting. If used inappropriately, it will reduce the reader's interest. However, as authors of online articles, we still need to encourage each other! Make persistent efforts! (First arrange the layout of the story, don't rush when writing the story, take your time, you will always attract readers)

Brother, your layout is terrible. Change it to make it look better

The plot is a bit slow, and the beginning focuses on introductions such as background. However, this type of introduction does not need to be too long, and should focus more on the advancement of the plot. The dialogue between the characters is a bit awkward. Like the middle-aged adventurer, it is possible to say a few words helplessly at the beginning, but it is unlikely that he will talk endlessly later. Unless he recognizes the identity of the protagonist, or the protagonist pays, which is more reasonable. Or you can set up a role such as a housekeeper. It is unreasonable to let a group of children run around on their own. It would be better to have someone to protect them and guide them. Reading the introduction should be a relatively new idea, and the content of the article should be taken up with the main line as soon as possible. Overall, it is okay. Keep writing, and come on!

The formatting of these chapters has been restored. The author has a good grasp of the rhythm of the book. Looking forward to it...