The Useless Bird's Tale of Winning the Divine Lord

When she was still a phoenix egg, he watched her every day, eager to raise her up and then gobble her down. “Jiujiu, remember to grow up to look like the beauty in this painting. Make sure you study this naughty little book carefully.”

When she was Fengyao, a phoenix-blossom spirit, the deity Duyi taught her all sorts of new positions every day. “Today, we’ll learn about the ways of the bedchamber.” Day after day.

When she was a little maid in the divine temple, he pressed her at every turn, pinning her to the bed and kissing her wantonly. “Ajiu, your lips taste so good.”

When she was the mortal Feng Jiuniang, he showered her with sweet words every day. Their time in the mountains was devoted to practicing positions. “Jiuniang, let me give you a massage.”

At long last, the useless bird became the phoenix deity Feng Jiu. He praised Ruiying’s Portrait of a Hundred Beauties with a tsk. “The deity Feng Jiu truly is the most beautiful woman in all the lands.” The moment they were alone, he pinned her against the wall, the bed, and wherever else he could, while she was dressed as a man. Then they made love, and he sighed with satisfaction. “Jiu, we still have work to do.”