My Thousand-Year-Old Boyfriend

What else falls from the sky besides free money? Plop! Handsome men fall from the sky too! Damn it! What’s so great about a handsome man? He’s no good for eating or chewing on, and he’s gone and trashed my house! Pay me back!!! You can’t afford it? Then get out there and work! You don’t know what to do? Fine! You can start as my fake boyfriend, personal bodyguard, and unpaid laborer! You! You eat my food, drink my drinks, use my things, and you still have the nerve to act so cocky! Hmph! But I have a sure-fire way to keep you in line! You miss home, don’t you? You want to go back, don’t you? Go on, beg me! Oh ho ho!