An Osmanthus Spirit's Survival Guide to a Crime Novel

Osmanthus Spirit Forensic Pathologist × Straight-Laced Detective

[System Warning: Body temperature 36°C → 87% chance of blooming]

Nan Qiao transmigrated into a book, becoming the doomed female supporting character in a crime novel: an osmanthus spirit whom the male lead personally sent to prison.

The good news: To infiltrate the criminal investigation world, she was born into this world and spent twenty years keeping her head down. At last, she became a forensic pathologist at Jiang City’s Criminal Technology Institute. As the saying goes, the safest place is right under the nose, so she can avoid the fate of being framed and imprisoned.

The bad news: A transfer order brought her a new partner: the original novel’s male lead, a walking, talking bloom trigger with a body temperature of 38°C.

Nan Qiao gritted her teeth. If she couldn’t afford to offend him, couldn’t she just avoid him? She immediately filed a request to change positions. At worst, she could quit.

Medical app: [Beep beep beep, Key character detected. Host, please complete the mission: Partner with Qin Huaian to solve the case of an influencer’s sudden death.]

[Mission reward: Temperature tolerance +5°C.]

Nan Qiao: ...

Qin Huaian, the famous second-generation rich kid of Linhai City’s Public Security Bureau, and the top detective with the highest case-solving rate.

His motto in life: "Trust science, reject superstition."

Their first crime scene

Facing a "Lolita" who had dropped out of the sky, he leaned against the doorframe, twirling a lighter. "Forensic pathologist Nan, why are you shaking?"

She clamped down hard on the flower stem poking out of her fingertip. "...Hypothermia."

Their first time alone together

Looking at Nan Qiao in her thin clothes, he "casually" turned up the heat. "Just say you're cold."

Her medical app blared out an alarm: [Warning! Body temperature 37°C → imminent social death!]

The moment her identity was exposed

At the scene of an explosion, golden blossoms burst open above her head.

He froze, then suddenly pulled out his phone. "Wait, let me Google 'why do people bloom.'"

Qin Huaian thought the new forensic pathologist on the team was a real handful. She was supposedly a brilliant, highly capable graduate, but she nitpicked whenever she joined a field assignment. If she could ride in a car, she refused to walk, and she was terribly pampered. Once they left a crime scene, she wouldn’t step outside an air-conditioned room. Even in the dead of winter, she wouldn’t let them turn on the heat. She was secretive all day long, playing dumb and pretending not to understand, and never told anyone how she got her leads. And yet, relying on her looks, several young wolves on the team competed to curry favor with her, even urging him, their captain, to get her a government car.

What a joke. What rank was she, that she should get a car?

Later, Qin Huaian sat in the driver's seat, his phone's search history filled with:

"Botany for Beginners"

"How to assign a subordinate a car without making it weird"

"How to give a subordinate an ice pack without making it weird"

"Is it perverted to fall for a nonhuman species?"

Later still, he scrawled a note on the case report:

"Suspect ruled out. Identified as: my personal plant."

%%A record of a straight man's face-slapping transformation

The Criminal Technology Institute where the heroine works is an identification support organization at the same level as the municipal Public Security Bureau. Simply put, if the bureau can't handle an identification or autopsy, it gets sent to the Institute~

The official positions and organizations in this story are entirely fictional. Dear readers, please don't use them as a reference for real life~

Warnings:

1. The male lead is a staunch materialist at first, an extreme looks enthusiast, and a steel-straight man. Later, he's all, "What's wrong with my wife being a potted plant?"

2. The heroine's ability to bloom has a scientific (pseudo-)explanation.

3. Episodic mystery cases. The protagonists have unlimited golden fingers. Everything is in service of fun.

Before signing, 2–3 updates per week~ Updates follow any rankings I make it onto~

Sometimes there may be a long gap between flower updates because I missed the timing or was at closed-door training... I'll make up the updates (in addition to the one due that day, there'll be two extra updates~)

Theme: Great love in this world