Everyone who has spent time with Xuduo describes him as lively, optimistic, positive, and cheerful.
But after getting to know him for a while, many people notice the telltale signs.
His arms wrapped up from head to toe, his eyes sometimes going blank, his body trembling uncontrollably, his face suddenly turning deathly pale.
These are the consequences of being born into a privileged family, the aftereffects his parents inflicted on him themselves.
Jiang Jingqing doesn't really understand why his simple politeness has made him someone others rely on.
To everyone else, Jiang Jingqing is perfect in every way: gentle, kind, handsome, and dependable.
But in truth, his blood runs cold, and so does his heart.
Xuduo can barely breathe under the pressure his parents put on him. He desperately needs love, but no one can give it to him.
Until he meets Jiang Jingqing. He pins his hopes of living on him, only to be betrayed.
At last, he chooses to let go, but Jiang Jingqing returns to his life in a domineering, forceful way.
If he could turn back time, Xuduo would want most of all to return to ten years ago.
He wouldn't fall in love with Jiang Jingqing, wouldn't covet his kindness, and wouldn't make him his reason to keep living.
--He wouldn't have looked up that first day of school, and then they wouldn't have been entangled for years to come.
[The main story is interspersed with many flashbacks]
[The love interest starts out straight, then makes himself gay later]
[Mostly angst, little sweetness]
[First-person narration]
[Both male leads have issues]
[The characters' values do not represent the author's. Please go easy on me!!!]
Theme: At last, the me who was used to relying on others has been abandoned by my emotional support.
