What Do I Do If the Sword God Goes Crazy?

*My new novel, My Archrival Begs Me Every Day to Stop Being a Saint, is now underway. Please add it to your reading list. The blurb is at the end!*

*Please don't read pirated copies. Piracy damages your fortune. You'll really get poorer and poorer and lose more and more money.*

On the first day Meng Qingqing joined the greatest righteous sect in the world to meet her idol, her worldview shattered into pieces.

Not only did the greatest righteous sect seem less than righteous, but even Xiao Hansheng, the Sword God revered by the entire martial world as its beloved moonlight, had become a mindless walking corpse, having lost all seven souls.

Meng Qingqing: ...

What do you do when your idol turns into an idiot? Asking online. This is urgent!

After she finally managed to gather all seven of Xiao Hansheng's souls, she thought peace had been restored. But to her surprise, he went mad!

Wei Zhushui: His mind is damaged and his emotions are in turmoil. He can't be cured. Just put up with it.

Meng Qingqing: ...

She was tired of hearing the words "put up with it."

When the joy among Xiao Hansheng's seven emotions took center stage, the most he did was hold her and mumble that he liked her. She thought she could just put up with that until it passed, but she forgot that besides "joy," the seven emotions also included "anger, sorrow, fear, love, hatred, desire..."

Sorrow--

Xiao Hansheng: I owe you my life. I should repay you by giving myself to you.

Meng Qingqing: I don't want you to repay me by giving yourself to me.

Xiao Hansheng began to cry without changing his expression. "That's true. I have nothing but my cultivation now. I'm also a little older and plain-looking. I'm not worthy of you. Perhaps I should retire to the mountains and end my days..."

Meng Qingqing: ...Such a good cup of tea. I'll drink it.

Fear--

Xiao Hansheng: Will you leave me too? Will you stop believing me too? Will you go with Wei Zhushui? Don't go, all right? Don't go...

Meng Qingqing: No, why would I go with him?

Wei Zhushui: He's sick.

Love--

Just when Meng Qingqing thought she could put up with it until it passed, she followed the smell of blood to Xiao Hansheng's room. When she pushed open the door, she saw that every inch of the walls was covered in countless lines written in blood: "I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you..."

Suddenly, the door behind her creaked open, and a pair of icy hands slowly came to rest on her shoulders...

Meng Qingqing: Help, there's a ghost!!

*

Meng Qingqing's idol was the greatest under heaven, but she knew her own limits and never thought she could become the greatest under heaven. Being the third, fourth, or fifth greatest would have been just fine. But she never expected...

She never expected to be given the title of greatest under heaven for no reason, before she had even cured her idol...

Meng Qingqing stared at the people across from her who were trying to rob her. She was just about to ask how much money they planned to take when they suddenly pointed at her sword and shouted, "The Xianghuan Sword... It's the Xianghuan Sword!"

"Quick, run! Meng Qingqing is here!!"

"Don't kill me! Don't kill me!! Take all the money, aaah!!!"

Meng Qingqing: ...

Seriously, what is going on? I haven't even drawn my sword yet. Why did they all suddenly run away?

And what are all those silver coins on the ground? I wasn't here to rob anyone!

Who on earth spread the rumor that I'm the greatest under heaven?!

*Sunny girl (female lead) X seemingly righteous but truly dark and twisted (male lead)

PS:

1. One-on-one romance, both leads pure, happy ending, happy ending, happy ending

2. A low-magic, high-martial-arts setting. A series of elementary-school-level "investigations" connects the main plot. Everything serves the romance.

3. A little angst adds flavor, but I promise it's sweet.

[New novel underway: My Archrival Begs Me Every Day to Stop Being a Saint]

Bad news: Li Chenjin died.

Good news: She came back to life, and not only that, she came back in time, hundreds of years into the past, where she met her archrival before he went bad and became a demon lord.

Li Chenjin: Good. Just watch me teach you how to behave!

Her archrival from hundreds of years ago had it rough. His sect had been destroyed, he was badly injured, he had nowhere to live, and he was starving.

Li Chenjin: Huh, no wonder you went so crazy in the future. Let me show you a little human kindness!

For a long time afterward, Li Chenjin made it her mission to turn her archrival into a righteous cultivator, and she pressed forward without wavering.

Her archrival is badly injured and his spiritual root is destroyed? No problem, she's experienced at treating that!

Her archrival has nowhere to live and is homeless? No problem, she's experienced at building houses too!

Her archrival is starving and has to eat once every other day? No problem, she's experienced at growing vegetables and cooking too!

Watching her archrival slowly change from looking like a dead man to looking like a living one, Li Chenjin was delighted. She felt she was one step closer to her goal of turning a future demon lord into an upright member of a distinguished sect. What a joyous occasion, truly a joyous occasion!

Until one day, while talking about the future, she said that she would eventually leave, and her archrival went a little crazy again.

Shen Zhengyuan: You're leaving? Why? Why are you leaving? Have I done something wrong?

Shen Zhengyuan: You said before that you wouldn't leave me... So you were lying to me all along, weren't you?

Li Chenjin: ...

Hey, friend, why are you making things up about me? When did I ever say anything like that?

Li Chenjin prepared every day to return to the underworld, but one month passed, then two months, then a year...

And she was still here.

Just as she began to suspect she might never get back and prepared to face life with a positive attitude...

She went back!

*

Li Chenjin only wanted to live her quiet little life in peace. She didn't expect to have bad luck the moment she stepped out, running into her archrival. She thought they were going to have some kind of conflict, but...

But her archrival took advantage of her being unconscious and locked her up.

Li Chenjin stared at the chains around her hands and feet, falling silent.

As she silently worked hard at picking the lock, a set of footsteps drew closer.

Shen Zhengyuan emerged slowly from the darkness. Looking at Li Xianghuan, who was picking the lock with even greater determination, he approached step by step with a smile in his eyes and said gently, "It's been a long time. Have you been sleeping well?"

"Today is a rare and auspicious day. Shall we get married?"

Li Chenjin: ...

Hey, friend, are you threatening me?

Their eyes met. Li Chenjin dropped her hairpin and stopped picking the lock.

She grabbed the chains and pulled hard with both hands. Right in front of Shen Zhengyuan, she yanked the other end of the chain out of the wall and threw it in front of him.

Shen Zhengyuan: ...

*

Scene One:

Li Chenjin teaches Shen Zhengyuan that one should let others off when possible, and let go of whatever can be put behind them.

Shen Zhengyuan nods to show he understands. But when she turns around, there are several corpses on the ground...

Li Chenjin: ...

There's no teaching him. There's just no teaching him. Is it still in time to start chanting the Rebirth Mantra?

Watching Li Chenjin get ready to tap the wooden fish, Shen Zhengyuan kindly asks, "If there are people you're too lazy to kill, tell me and I'll kill them for you."

Scene Two:

Looking at her former enemy, Li Chenjin says, "Let's let bygones be bygones."

Shen Zhengyuan nods in agreement. "The grudges of the past should indeed be settled."

Then she sees her former enemy, beaten half to death by Shen Zhengyuan and dragged in front of her so she can kill him herself.

Li Chenjin: ...

That's not what I meant by settling things! Don't read my message and reply to something else, okay!!!

Scene Three:

Everyone says Shen Zhengyuan has a companion named Li Chenjin, who's not only a saintly do-gooder but also meek and submissive, never holding a grudge. If they capture her, they can use her to threaten Shen Zhengyuan. So...

Li Chenjin looks at the blade held to her neck and says, "You'd better release me as soon as possible, or you'll all lose your lives."

Naturally, no one believes her. Seeing a hand reach for the weapon at her waist, Li Chenjin sighs. "As the saying goes, Heaven has the virtue of cherishing life..."

When Shen Zhengyuan hears that Li Chenjin has been captured and rushes over, he finds her laboriously digging a pit to bury the bodies.

Li Chenjin waves him over. "Come help me dig."

And so, overnight, more than a hundred unmarked graves appeared on that mountain.

Rumor has it that Shen Zhengyuan is a madman who kills without batting an eye, terrifying everyone. They can only hope Li Chenjin will reform him as soon as possible.

But who knew that Li Chenjin would be no less ruthless...

She's a madwoman who kills while batting her eyes.

*

The former greatest under heaven (female lead), who seems lazy but is actually super cool, x the gloomy, crazy, vengeful former world-destroying demon lord (male lead)

[Reading Guide]

1. One-on-one romance, happy ending

2. Fast-paced, mutual redemption

3. Both leads are strong. The male lead always takes revenge and is no gentleman. The female lead delivers physical salvation.

Theme: Turn a desperate situation around, grow along the way, and protect peace throughout the land together