I Tame Monsters Around the World with My Singing

The Tone-Deaf Me Tames Monsters Around the World with My Brain-Piercing Devilish Singing, and the Whole Internet Begs Me to Sing!

When a wave of dimensional monsters swept across the globe, all the heavenly voices turned out to be useless. But then Lu Ming, mocked by the entire internet as "the lark of the human world (slaughterhouse edition)," stepped forward. After all, even the Abyssal Giant Lizard couldn't help beating time with its tail when it heard him sing!

[Iconic Moments]

Iconic live taming moment: I serenade an S-rank monster that even a nuclear bomb can't crack. It immediately performs a macho-man's tearful breakdown and makes three heart-shaped signs in a row with its eight tentacles.

Grammy face-slapping footage: The judges who once called me a "musical terrorist" are now clutching my fan light sticks in the audience and cheering like crazy.

Global trending topics: #HasLuMingSungToday #ProgressOnDevelopingNewSonicWeapons #UNRequestsMoreEncoreSongs

When Lu Ming takes dimensional monsters dancing in the Alps, his former haters beg for a recording: "The worse the singing, the more addictive it gets!"

A top musician certifies through tears: "Your voice cracks are the code to saving the world, and your off-key singing is the key to rewriting humanity's fate!"

The fan club the monsters secretly set up: We're not freaks, we just love this soul-shaking, hair-raising sound more than heavenly music.

[Ultimate Off-Key Edition]

"Report! An unidentified creature at the bottom of the Pacific is playing a recording of Lu Ming's concert on repeat. Wait, are they... singing along?!"

[Reader Advisory]

This isn't a conventional entertainment-industry wish-fulfillment story. Every chapter pushes the limits of human shame.

We recommend wearing a device to protect your laughing muscles from spasms, so you don't throw your back out laughing at the outrageous antics.

Joint statement from the world's monsters: We're really not masochists. It's just that his singing is... damn sweet!

Theme: You reap what you sow.