This Being RE: Seventeen

I have torn up so many pages with endings already written,*

*just as deftly as I have undone your shirt buttons time and time again.

"How do you save someone who died for you, when he can't even remember saving you?"

"A lifetime is too short. I'm greedy. I want your next life to belong to me too."

A secretly passionate, aloof spectator seme x a cheerful, easygoing uke with a hard life (older seme. Note: Xun Bao is straight at first, and a little tsundere. But as the saying goes, a straight guy is just deep in the closet!)

After barely surviving high school, Qi Xun was finally ready to kick back and enjoy life after the college entrance exams. He was celebrating with drinks when he woke up from a drunken stupor and realized he'd transmigrated! Worse, he'd landed in the second year of high school, just before the grueling third year began!

Qi Xun roared inside: "Why me?! Why couldn't it happen to someone else?!"

He looked back at the life he had to return to and realized he'd have to live with his awful father for another year and a half.

Qi Xun was thoroughly miserable.

Once he'd recovered and gone to school, he ran into someone who hadn't been in his memories, and was forced to watch the whole scene of a "bad student" being called out by a teacher at the school gate.

Qi Xun was even more miserable. What was all this?

Then he got to the classroom and discovered that this person was his deskmate!!! Could Qi Xun apply for a painless suicide?

[Qi Xun: Hello, my name is Qi Xun. I've arrived in hell.

Underworld receptionist: Here's your ticket. Keep it safe, and when your time comes, go line up over there.

Qi Xun: Oh, okay, okay.

Fang Qing hurried home, only to find his wife gone?!

At that moment, Xun Bao was striding toward his beautiful next life when he suddenly felt an excruciating headache.

Can a ghost really die a second time?

Qi Xun woke up in a daze. "Huh? Who are you?"

Fang Qing straightened his collar. "Hello, Qi. I'm Fang Qing."]

That was all bad enough, but he discovered that even though this body looked exactly like his own, his past seemed to have changed. Most of all, his most hated father from his memories had actually... treated this world's Qi Xun well?

World B, how am I supposed to accept this?!

The above is the silly blurb, from Qi Xun's perspective.

A more serious blurb, from Fang Qing's perspective:

[Why should I believe you'll help me?

Because it's me. Only I can give you a chance to go back to the past.

What's the price?]

Twenty-seven years after my death, I met him in his third life. After his memories had been altered twice, he seemed to be growing more carefree by the day. I couldn't see a trace of the person he used to be. If the old him saw what he'd become, would he keep his distance?

[What did you say? He knows?! How could he know about what happened before? Didn't you already change his memories?

Too many alterations, too much time travel, and other reasons.

Then... why doesn't he remember me?

I don't know.]

Do you know how shocked I was when I learned you remembered what happened before?

You're deliberately avoiding me.

Who are you trying to hide it from? Why won't you say anything? Couldn't you tell me?

Why do you remember everyone but me?

[You said his memories are confused. Why?

His memories now are nothing but a delusion, a dream within a dream.

Including the memories I altered?

His first life's wish has now seeped into his third life's dream.

A dream within a dream.]

What a perfect dream within a dream. You might as well call me a fool dreaming the impossible. I always thought that if I changed everything about you, you'd live a good life and we'd be together. But look at us now.

I've ruined everything.

I've been the only one deceiving myself from beginning to end.

[He's gone. You should be happy. Oh, right, you can't leave.

I'll trade you something for a favor.

You have no right to ask.

I know where your brother is.

What favor? Say it. If you're trying to blackmail me, I'll make sure he doesn't survive either.

Please help me protect him. Don't let him die.]

Just don't let him die. Let him live somewhere I can't be.

*Why didn't you come find me?

*I can't have you, not even in the next life.

P.S.

- The main couple is one-on-one with a happy ending.

- Everyone has "morals" and sharp tongues.

- A slow-paced story that sometimes takes off at full speed and becomes a straight-up romance.

- Quite a few couples (?). Everyone gets a little attention! Surely there's a pairing you'll like ^^.

Side couples: A gentle, slightly unsettling ghost seme who is a painter x a warm-hearted young uke who's just as crafty (older seme).

A grumpy, wild, heartbroken seme who cries x a good-natured, aloof uke who avoids the world of literature (younger seme, pseudo-incest).

- Reincarnation and transmigration, with shifting perspectives.

- A fairly lighthearted writing style.

- School life at first, then the main plot takes over and no longer revolves around school (because they graduated, haha ^^).

- Mostly sweet (?). Some angst is bearable. At least the author can handle it. I don't know how much the readers can take.

- The characters' personalities and inner lives in the story aren't entirely the same as in the blurb, so don't accuse the author of writing them out of character.

- To satisfy myself, the first chapter of the extras will have a bad ending for the main couple, haha.

Core idea: Love the world, love yourself.