The Aloof Patriarch Relies on My Kisses to Stay Alive

Naturally blunt, mischievous kitten x tsundere ancestor who says one thing and means another

*

A major event has recently shaken the cultivation world: Spirit Mountain has opened.

The divine beast Ming Xi, imprisoned for eight years, has opened her eyes.

What divine beast?

Everyone knows her. The Spirit Mountain's divine master is unruly, cruel, bloodthirsty, despicable, and vicious. Eight years ago, she nearly perished at the Imperial City. She only survived by forcibly forming a pact with Ancestor Jiwu. Now she's awake again...

The good news: She's lost her memories.

The bad news: Ancestor Jiwu, bound to the divine beast, is on the brink of death after suffering the backlash.

There's only one way to extend her life: hurry up and get close to the contracted divine beast. Cuddle! Cuddle!

*

Ancestor Jiwu was born with a peerlessly beautiful, otherworldly appearance. Aloof and proud, she despises all demonic heresies and would never get close to that divine beast.

Unfortunately, Ming Xi has always been a willful bully. She uses dream-theft arts to enter Jiwu's dreams and torments her night after night until she can't fight back.

"Master~ You look so weak. A kiss from Ming Xi will make you feel better!"

"Master~ You're hurt. Hurry and let Ming Xi hug you and lift you up high!"

"Master, I heard the Spirit Mountain's divine master is hard to kill. What will you do if she comes back for revenge?"

Jiwu: ...She did come back. I just had no idea she had such a thing for this!

*

As the moon waxed toward its fullness, Ming Xi finally remembered how she had fallen into the humans' trap. Her heart darkened in an instant, and she faked her death and escaped into the Dream Court, realizing that home was still the most comfortable place.

Ming Xi was so happy she forgot about her ancestors.

Then she heard that after the contract had been severed, Ancestor Jiwu, who should have been freed, had changed completely and was almost mad.

Ming Xi waved it off. "What does that have to do with me? Hurry up and send over the beauty I invited yesterday."

The crimson curtains lifted in the breeze. A length of light silk curled around Ming Xi and drew her onto a small boat.

The boat rocked gently. Ming Xi, her eyes covered by a feathered veil, raised her palm and softly pressed it against the slender waist of the woman on the bed, aroused with desire.

The voice by her ear, more familiar than any other, was no longer cool. It was full of yearning.

"The full moon leaves one depleted, so you'll need plenty of nourishment..."

"Xi Xi, do you know how to help your master recover?"

A damp, sinister, dark-hearted one who only loves her master x a cool, righteous paragon who is all talk

Coming Soon: The Rich Hong Kong Island Heiress Who Keeps Trying to Feed Me

Find it directly on my author page, dear readers, please add it to your lists!

A scruffy, honest, penniless goofball x a haughty heiress with money to burn

Xia Chennu is a second-year graduate student in pharmacology. Her main subject is... getting beaten up by society!

She'd just found a part-time job and almost got scammed, so she ducked into an unmanned convenience store to buy a cheap meal, only to discover it was actually a specialty goods shop.

The exit button suddenly stopped working. After finally contacting the owner to come open the door, she discovered that the owner was the older girl she'd wronged back in college.

Her voice still had that lingering, haughty Hong Kong lilt. But as soon as she spoke, Xia Chennu's back went cold. "Found you."

As icy and beautiful as ever, Zhen Yinyan had grown even more stunning in the two years they'd been apart. But her distant expression made it clear she hadn't recognized Xia Chennu.

Xia Chennu was timid as a puppy. She thought she could escape this seductive hunt, but still fell for the words, "Got the guts to come home with me right now?"

She didn't have much courage, but Xia Chennu had plenty of lust.

After they'd made love, Xia Chennu pretended to ask how her older girl had been.

Zhen Yinyan: I've been studying wellness lately.

Nuonuo, shocked: Studying graduate students?

*

A new market opened in Sai Ying Pun, and Xia Chennu found [a billion] jobs there.

1. Selling pop-up blind boxes: each one contains a surprise sister.

Zhen Yinyan: Oh, that's one of our brands.

2. Making jianbing: after a week of losing money, a whole building's worth of breakfast orders suddenly came in.

Zhen Yinyan: Ah, that's just an everyday employee perk at my company.

...Even the "sacrifice" who crushed all the players to come see Xia Chennu while she was working as an NPC in a haunted house turned out to be Zhen Yinyan.

Zhen Yinyan cornered Xia Chennu on a lotus pedestal and lifted her chin, speaking softly. "My dear immortal, I've got money and sweetness, both."

"Why did you dump me out of nowhere?"

Theme: Treasure the person in front of you.