Saving Myself

**The blurb for my next book is after this one. If you're interested, please add it to your favorites!** [#Selfcest# Gentle, sickly, double-standard-setting, occasionally unhinged older bottom vs. defiant, love-starved, awkward, self-conquering younger top] 1. The last member of the Spirit Clan, Lin Cang, cut open his own chest and tore out his heart. But when he opened his eyes again, he had returned to the past and met his former self. The young man wore a fierce expression, the corners of his eyes sharp as blades, like a wounded, bloodthirsty wolf. He held out a hand to the young man and tried to smile. "My name is Lin Yuan." The character for Yuan has water in the middle and banks on either side. Lin Yuan made a decision. Even if the ending was certain death, he would save his former self. He would be his shore. 2. Lin Cang couldn't see through Lin Yuan, but that didn't stop him from falling for him, step by step. He knew Lin Yuan was gay, but always felt Lin Yuan was looking through him at someone else. He had never endured the hardships Lin Yuan had, nor taken part in any of his earlier life. Lin Yuan was indifferent to life and death, but he wasn't heartless. He had simply lived through those deaths over and over. Someone had already given their life for him, dying in his arms as they struggled, tasted his tears, and kissed the corner of his lips. Whether they brushed cheeks and whispered together or embraced with their necks entwined, he still wasn't the person in Lin Yuan's heart. He would never catch up to him. 3. One time, after drinking too much, the younger man confessed his feelings to the older one. Lin Yuan: ? It was one thing for the kid to fall for him through sheer imagination right under his nose. But a stand-in, a white moonlight, a faked death, a reveal, a lovers-to-enemies arc, and a second-chance pursuit... What kind of melodramatic script had he ended up in?! - "Was there really no one else?" Lin Cang asked again and again. "You tell me." Lin Yuan, whose former self had imagined an epic romance, gritted his teeth and suddenly grabbed Lin Cang's hand, pressing it hard against his sash. "If I give you what you want, will you dare take it?" The young man's pitch-black eyes suddenly filled with a glimmer of light, as if the darkest night before dawn had finally met the sunrise. But dawn never came... because desire, like a black sea, roiled in those eyes and swallowed Lin Yuan, replacing the despair that had once filled them. How had he never noticed the despair in Lin Cang's eyes before? Lin Yuan reached out and slowly smoothed the furrow between Lin Cang's brows. His fingertips traced the young man's ink-black eyes and brows, the sharp lines of his face, and finally came to rest on his pale lips. He watched the desire in the young man's eyes swell like a rising tide. "How... could I... not dare?" Lin Cang leaned over, spread Lin Yuan's fingers, and laced their hands together, speaking each word slowly. - [Reading Guide] ① A selfcest redemption story, with a happy ending. The top has the script of an old-school melodramatic love-brained romantic, while the bottom has a friendship-bond script. Their conversations are like ships passing in the night. ② Before his identity is revealed, the bottom appears in disguise. Afterward, his appearance changes depending on his mood. - ***Blurb for the upcoming book, Yiguang*** [Power couple: max-strength bottom and max-intelligence top] Zhai Yao, chief genius scientist at the NS Research Institute, is keeping a secret lover on the side. Lu Jiuchuan: I'm really not here to catch you cheating. Back then, he died in a dark sewer, his body covered in signs of abuse and so badly waterlogged it had begun to rot. Zhai Yao held his ashes and stayed silent for three days and nights. Then, on the day of the funeral, his secret lover suddenly showed up and caused a scene, nearly scattering his ashes. Two years later, Lu Jiuchuan came back. "Chief Zhai, do you remember an operative named Lu Bei, who died horribly in a sewer two years ago?" ***This will be my next book. If you're interested, please add it to your favorites! Sending love~~ - Theme: Help yourself before helping others.